


It'll Always Be Us

by jonghhho



Category: ATEEZ (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Angst with a Happy Ending, Blow Jobs, Coming Out, Drinking, Eventual Smut, Getting Together, Hate to Love, Kissing, Lots of kissing, M/M, Mentions of Sex, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Panic Attacks, Polyamory, Recreational Drug Use, Smut, ahhhahah, bisexual yunho, but who knows, forgive me god for i havev sinned, hongjoong/jongho, i didn't know it was gonna happen it just did, idk how it happened but i'm not mad about it, ish, its not that angsty, jongho scares everybody, maybe lol, mentions of hongjoong/seonghwa
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-04
Updated: 2020-05-23
Packaged: 2020-12-21 08:09:50
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 8
Words: 33,979
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21071690
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jonghhho/pseuds/jonghhho
Summary: Yunho hadn't expected to ever see him again. Sitting between his two roommates, he does a double take at their server. Dressed in a white button down and an apron wrapped around his hips. His hair is a striking red and there are round glasses framing his face. And he can't help but gape at the boy as he hands out menus and cups of water because Yunho has truly never thought that he would ever see that face again.After all, he'd promised himself that he wouldn't ever think about Song Mingi again four years ago.





	1. chapter 1

Yunho hadn't expected to ever see him again. Sitting between his two roommates (why did they sit him there in the first place) and across from the kind of funny, kind of frightening first year kid they met an hour ago, he does a double take at their server. Dressed in a white button down and an apron wrapped around his hips. His hair is a striking red and there are round glasses framing his face. 

And he can't help but gape at the boy as he hands out menus and cups of water because Yunho has truly never thought that he would ever see that face again. The boy leaves without really looking around at their table. An arm nudges him on the side. 

"Control yourself, you chaotic gay," comes San's voice. Yunho blinks and sinks down in his seat as Wooyoung snickers beside him and the new kid, Jongho, raises an eyebrow at him. 

"You know him?" San asks. Yunho just stares at his menu, deep in thought. Maybe if he keeps looking down the whole time, he won't be recognized. But then again, who says he'll necessarily be recognized anyway? He's changed a lot in the last 4 years. But Yunho knows that he, himself, could never forget that face, no matter how much it’s changed. 

"An ex of yours?" Jongho asks. Wooyoung laughs at this too. 

"Mr. Jung Yunho here hasn't gone on a date since high school." 

And at that Yunho barks. "Not true, asshole." But he shakes his head. 

"No I- I don't know him," he simply says. They didn't need to know about that past of his. 

When the boy comes back, Yunho almost holds his breath. They order a pizza and two pastas and the server jots down their orders. Yunho definitely flinches a little as he hands his menu over, but the boy doesn't look at him. He just tells them their order will be on its way soon and leaves. 

Throughout their meal, Yunho admittedly tries not to watch the boy, and fails. He definitely finds himself drowning out the conversation around their table and feels a little sorry for not paying attention to anything that their new friend says, but he can't help but try to figure out if their server even recognizes him a little. 

In the end, the boy only holds Yunho's gaze for a second as he asks them if they're done with their plates. He looks for any flicker of recognition or an acknowledgement of his presence, but there's nothing. 

When they leave the restaurant and say their goodbyes to Jongho, Yunho walks far behind his two roommates and wonders whether or not he should have said something. 

Or maybe he'll just try to refrain from going back to the restaurant. After all, he'd promised himself that he wouldn't ever think about Song Mingi again four years ago. 

Yunho had met mingi in elementary school. The boy had transferred in from a different school and was the attraction of all the kids in his class for about a week. He was a shy kid and wasn't too much of a talker but Yunho forced himself to be the kid's friend (like he did everyone in the school, basically). Mingi was fun. He liked playing soccer and was good at all kinds of things and Yunho grew fond of him. 

By middle school they were inseparable. They both started getting into music and dancing and before Yunho ever realized he liked boys just as much as he liked girls, Mingi had planted a seed inside of him. 

When the summer after middle school rolled around, Yunho had decided that he was going to confess. He was going to put it all out there and no matter what Mingi said, their friendship was going to continue. Not because it wouldn’t be uncomfortable or whatever, but because it just had to. It had to because Yunho wasn’t really ready to lose a friend yet.

And as Yunho climbed the ridiculous hill that separated Mingi’s apartment complex from his own, he felt the hot, stuffy summer air blow across his cheeks and something felt off. 

Something felt so off that he started sprinting toward the crest of the hill where the complex entrance was. And taking the steps two at a time (damn the slow ass elevator) Yunho felt a hollow unsettling feeling at the pit of his stomach because for some reason the grungy blue moving truck downstairs seemed like a bad omen.

And Yunho was right. There in the hallway stood Mingi, clutching at a small box of comic books and CDs he’d accumulated with silent tears streaming down his face. Then the boy looks up. And Mingi had always been shorter than Yunho, but just then he looked to much smaller; so much younger.

“What’s going on?” Yunho asked as three movers exited the apartment carrying various boxes that were obviously hastily packed and labeled. 

Mingi stared at him for a half beat too long and then mumbled out, “We’re moving.” 

And although Yunho felt his entire world crumbling within his grasp, he tilted his head and smiled. He knew that they were still just kids and that they didn’t have much say in the decisions their parents made. And yes, he knew how quick this decision had come, but he didn’t feel like questioning it. 

So Yunho smiled and reached out a hand to Mingi. He sat the other boy down beside him in the hallway of the apartment complex as movers came in and out and Mingi’s father looked on at them with pitying eyes. 

“It’s gonna be okay,” he had promised. He pulled out the phone that his parents had finally gotten for him after graduation and flashed it at Mingi. 

“We have phones now. It’s not the 20th century anymore. I’ll text you and I’ll visit when we’re on break.”

Mingi seemed to hear Yunho’s words and nodded slowly. The boy’s eyes shined as he looked up at him and Yunho couldn’t help but feel that there was something that they were both holding back. 

The tears on Mingi’s face had dried long ago and as the sun hung low on the horizon and the orange rays bathed the side of the building, Yunho waved goodbye to Mingi. His best friend. His first love. 

A week and a half after ‘the incident’, Yunho finds himself at his usual cafe just two blocks from campus. It’s one of the lesser known cafes and it’s nice because that means it usually has lots of seating and is convenient for studying. 

He practically dashes in through the door with his two friends in tow, all of them groaning at the sudden rain that had started battering down at them halfway across campus. Shoving his sweatshirt off, Yunho calls to them to go claim a table.

Hair still dripping in front of his eyes, he approaches the register but stops midway, spotting a familiar red haired boy behind the espresso machine. He’s adorned in a gray button up today with the same golden framed glasses perched on his nose and Yunho can’t help but stare a little because the last four years have apparently been very kind to the boy before him.

Dragging up all the courage that’s fluttering in his stomach (or maybe that’s something else entirely) he stalks to the register and a pretty girl steps up to take his order. Once he’s done, he rushes back to the tables to find his two friends animatedly talking about some weekend gossip. 

Yunho settles in and pulls out his biology textbook so he can pretend to be studying and bury his face in the pages of the raggedy thing. As he opens up his laptop, San nudges him in the ribs.

“Isn’t that the guy that you were drooling over at that pizza place a week ago?” He asks nodding to the red haired boy, still busy frothing milk. 

Yunho slumps in his seat like he did that night. “How should I know?” 

Yeosang glances behind him and raises his eyebrows. “You mean Mingi? You guys know him?” 

Dread fills Yunho’s chest and he looks up at the boy. Yeosang practically knew everyone on campus. Given, they didn’t go to a particularly large school and Yeosang had girls and guys drooling over him ever since he’d grown into his ears in middle school, he should have seen this coming. 

“Uh, no? Yunho was just mentally undressing him at the pizza place last week.” San answers. Not a moment later, Yunho sees the red haired boy approaching their table with a tray of drinks. 

“Two iced americanos and a caramel latte?” Yunho is frozen in his spot as the boy places their drinks on the table. 

“Hey Mingi, what’s up? I didn’t know you worked here?” Yeosang starts. Yunho glances up at the red haired boy. He’s smiling at Yeosang sheepishly.

“Yea, well I work here and at the pizza place on the west side of campus. You know, gotta pay those bills.” There are goosebumps forming on Yunhos’ arms because that voice is so very different than the voice of the Mingi that he used to know. 

“Yea, I mean that’s why I live on campus. Anyway, this is San and Yunho. We were all on the dance team last year. The one that I told you about.” 

As the red haired boy turns to face him and San, Yunho finally catches Mingi’s eyes faltering. There’s definitely recognition there, and a pause before he nods politely at the two of them. 

“You dance?” San asks, interest piqued. Mingi nods and Yunho waits. Is he gonna mention that they used to know each other? 

“Yea I started in, uh- middle school.” And there’s that faltering again. Yunho tenses even more at the obvious uncertainty that passes over Mingi’s face again. He gulps back the knot in his throat and takes a sip of his drink. 

“I’ve been looking for somewhere to try to get back into it and then I met Yeosang the first week of classes and he told me about the dance team.” He continues. There’s a nervous fluttering of fingers that Yunho catches from the boy. “I’m thinking of auditioning.” 

San perks up and smiles so the tails of his eyes crinkle. “We could really use your height. Yunho here is always sticking out like a sore thumb because none of the rest of us are really that tall.” 

Mingi glances at Yunho and when their eyes meet, there’s hesitance. Words that have been swallowed and greetings that should have been exchanged already; but Yunho doesn’t know if he wants that yet. So he just nods curtly. 

They’re calling Mingi back to the bar so he quickly excuses himself and then it’s just the three of them again. Yeosang happily sips his drink, but San turns to him with a frown. “What was that?” 

Yunho opens his textbook for real this time. He can’t help the slight anger that ripples through him. All those days waiting for a text or a call from his supposed best friend only to have silence answer his every breath. 

“I don’t know,” he answers truthfully. San sighs but doesn’t dig for any more answers. 

I takes him ten minutes of staring at his notes for Yunho to huff out a sigh and close his book. “I’m gonna go. Can’t really focus here today.” 

He leaves without another word, his two friends staring after him with questioning eyes. He doesn’t even take his coffee with him. 

Yunho sits in the darkness of his room and listens to the rain pattering against his window. His oath to not think about Mingi was obviously crumbling at an exponential speed. He forgets all about his assignments and just stares up at his ceiling. 

Hours pass, he hears Wooyoung and San returning and ignores the knocks at his door. He’s just not in the mood to talk to anyone. Dinner comes and goes and Wooyoung texts him to check if he’s alright. Yunho shoots him back a quick ‘ok’. 

He’s not even really thinking about anything important, but he can’t seem to pull himself out of his thoughts. 

When his clock reads 12:00 AM, Yunho finally decides to drag himself into his bathroom and wash up. He fogs up the bathroom with an almost scalding shower and then drags himself back into bed. When he closes his eyes, an unknown exhaustion claims him quickly. He dreams about the red haired boy of his past.

Yunho must be pretty lucky because when he wakes to the front door of his apartment shutting and locking, the clock reads 9:00 AM. He knows San and Wooyoung both have classes at 9:30 AM. 

Lucky.

It’s Friday, which is nice because Yunho doesn’t have any Friday classes thanks to the dance department not scheduling any and strategically planning his weeks. So he lazes around for another thirty minutes before he gets up. 

He manages to go about his morning routine successfully without letting his mind run wild and heads out the door with his headphones plugged and blasting new hip-hop music. He runs choreography in his head and takes note of which songs he might use for his audition. 

He doesn’t let Song Mingi linger in his head for longer than a second. The endless, pointless thoughts are bound to drive him crazy one way or another so better to stay productive in order to drown out his thoughts rather than sit and stare at his ceiling. 

When he gets to the campus studios, he’s surprised to find that only one is occupied. Maybe it’s just early and everyone else with a brain would sleep until noon, if given the chance. 

He passes two unoccupied studios and peeks into the third occupied one. There are two girls in matching black outfits running through a contemporary piece. 

Yunho takes refuge in the studio at the far back of the building. Plugging in his phone, he runs through a quick warm up and then lets his body move freely to whatever song comes on next. Soon he’s sweating through his shirt but he’s got a good rhythm going. 

The song that plays next is aggressive and abrasive with lots of percussion and angry lyrics and Yunho throws himself into it with full force. He’s kicking and slamming himself down onto the ground and when the instrumental fades and the track ends, he’s lying on the floor, breathless and boneless.

With his eyes closed, he listens as a softer song starts with electric guitar sounds strong in the foreground of the track. His mind is racing with the events of yesterday and the silence that rings through his room in the back of his head. His breaths are ragged and there’s a piercing sound ringing in his ears and then the door of the studio clicks open.

Yunho’s eyes fly open and he looks up through the mirror at the red haired boy that he’d been trying to forget about all morning. 

As Mingi steps into the studio, Yunho sits up to blood rushing in his ears and goosebumps spreading along his arms. His red hair is just as striking as it had been just yesterday and without the glasses framing his face, he looks younger–almost the same as four years ago, sans the baby fat that had adorned his cheeks. 

His body moves without really thinking. He shuts off the music and turns to face Mingi properly. Finally, he takes in the boy’s face and scrutinizes him carefully. Standing face to face with him, Yunho realizes that Mingi is almost as tall as him now whereas he’d always been noticeably taller than the boy years ago. 

There’s a long moment of silence as they stand there and take each other in. Words form and disappear in Yunho’s head and he can tell that the same goes for Mingi. He’s opening and closing his mouth, reaching for the right opening line. 

In the end, Yunho is the first to speak. “Hey.” 

It’s short, simple, and yet overly complicated. Mingi is wordless for another moment then mumbles out “hi” in return. Silence stretches on again for so long that it’s suffocating but Yunho breaks the tension. He huffs a sigh and grabs his bag from the corner of the room. 

“If you’re here to practice, then feel free. I was just leaving.” 

The words sound harsh even to his own ears, but he can’t bring himself to feel sorry. So many thoughts bubble up in his chest but he holds them at bay. As he steps past Mingi and to the door, the red haired boy says, “I’m sorry.” 

Yunho’s steps falter and he halts to a stop. Shoulder to shoulder to his best friend from years ago, Yunho embraces the pain and anger and all the things he wants to say. He contemplates shouting at the boy. Telling him about all the weeks he waited for a reply and never got a single text. He contemplates confessing to him about how much he missed him and how much he liked him. 

For a split second, Yunho thinks he might. That he might turn toward the boy, look him in the eye and tell him off. But he doesn't. He closes his eyes and takes a deep breath. 

“Me too.” 

And with those words, he walks out of the studio. He walks out of the building and doesn’t look back. Half of him wishes that Mingi would run after him, but he’s no main character from a sappy American rom-com and he knows that it doesn’t happen in real life. 

And he knows that deep down he is sorry.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hello! this is my first story here on ao3. i've been writing for a while but i gradually stopped and was trying really hard to get back into it. who knew that all i needed to do was stan ateez for that to happen? anyway, come yell at me on twitter at [jonghhho](https://twitter.com/jonghhho)!


	2. chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **! trigger warning :: panic attacks !**

Yunho accidentally throws open the door to his apartment, effectively earning a scream from Wooyoung. He stalks into the living room where Wooyoung is staring up at him from the couch with wide eyes. San is lying with his head in his boyfriend’s lap, blinking sleepily up at him as Wooyoung gently cards his hands through the other’s hair. 

“Have you considered opening the door gently?” Wooyoung asks, peering at him incredulously.

“Sorry,” Yunho mumbles. He slips onto the armchair and groans as his muscles protest. 

“Coming from practice?” San asks. Yunho nods and tries not to think about Song Mingi.

“Uh-huh,” he answers. He can feel the stickiness of the dried sweat on his skin. 

“Well, if you’re feeling up to it, Sannie and I are going to a party tonight? Wanna come? I think Yeosang and some of his other friends are gonna be there too.” 

The thought of going out makes Yunho groan. He’s honestly too tired, drained from the events of the morning to really want to do anything else but curl up in a ball and sleep his thoughts away. 

But maybe he needs a different kind of distraction. Loud music, alcohol, bodies crowded into small spaces and perhaps even a random stranger to make out with. Maybe that would finally make his mind stop racing. 

“Okay,” he replies. Wooyoung whoops at the answer and San giggles almost drunkenly. Yunho apologizes again for slamming the door and escapes to his room to shower the sweat and grime off his body. 

He can’t get Mingi’s face out of his head, but he tries as hard as he can to ignore it. 

When they arrive at the house later that night, San and Wooyoung are already yelling at the top of their lungs, a little tipsy and overly excited. Yunho follows along, slightly less excited, but glad to be out anyway. People greet them with equally loud yells as they step into the house, already stuffy with the heat of the bodies. 

Yunho spots some people from the dance team already making the living room space into their stage and although he thinks about joining them, San and Wooyoung seem to have different ideas. They both grab him and drag him through the swaying crowd of dancers and down a hallway packed with conversing people and into the kitchen area. 

The kitchen counters are packed with an array of different kinds of alcohol. Colorful bottles of vodka line one counter and in the center of the room, a large cooler stands open with cans of beer packed in tightly. Whoever is throwing this party is going to have one hell of a reputation as a good party thrower. 

In a blur of motion and loud noises, the three of them are joined by Yeosang and the first year kid, Jongho. A shot glass full to the brim is shoved into Yunho’s hand and it sloshes a little as he brings it to his mouth. The vodka tastes faintly of lime and burns all the way down to his stomach. 

Yunho breathes in through his nose and out through his mouth. The first year kid starts having a coughing fit, cringing at the burn in his throat and Yeosang is already pouring them all new shots of the pineapple mango vodka. 

Four shots later, Yunho already feels the alcohol buzzing through his limbs. He’s dragged back through the hall and into the living room where there’s a flurry of movement with bodies grinding against one another. He’s got a can of beer in his hand but it doesn’t stop him from following his two roommates into the middle of the crowd and swinging his hips to the girl group song that plays through the speakers.

Three songs in, Yunho finds himself front to back with a pretty girl from his biology class. He’s no stranger to girls, so he just goes with the flow, letting the girl set the pace and wind her fingers through his. Wooyoung shoots him a playful wink from a few feet away as he and San grind together in close proximity, whispering into each other’s ears and laughing. 

When the song changes again, the girl turns in his arms and smiles up at him. She starts talking about something but Yunho doesn’t hear anything. Instead he peers over the heads of the crowd and locks eyes with a boy with bright red hair. 

The girl is crowding into his space now, wrapping her arms around his middle and babbling about something and Yunho feels the sudden need to be somewhere else. He quickly apologizes to the girl (he doesn’t even know her name) and disentangles himself from her embrace and the crowd. He can tell that Mingi’s eyes follow him through the crowd and out into the hallway. 

He passes by an arm wrestling competition in the kitchen, in which Jongho seems to be winning, out through the back door and onto the back porch. The raised deck opens out into a grassy field on the left and a swimming pool on the right. There are people by the fire pit in the corner of the deck, sitting along the stairs, and swimming in the pool. He quickly darts down the stairs and heads for a set of chairs in the middle of the lawn where no one seems to be hanging around. 

He’d come out to the party in hopes of erasing the thoughts of Song Mingi from his head, and yet here he is, running from the red haired boy once again. 

There's a loud ruckus from the pool area but Yunho focuses himself on the cool night air and evening out his breathing. He should have known the other would be there. It was a pretty huge patty, after all, and everyone seemed to have been invited. 

"Yunho? A voice comes from behind. When he turns to the voice, he's relieved to see Yeosang standing a few steps away. 

"Hey," he says in greeting. The boy doesn't look half as inebriated as he probably is, but that's probably due to the natural sleepiness that his eyes always carry. 

"Tired of the action? Seemed like you were gonna be going home with that girl on the dance floor earlier," he asks, stepping around the lawn chair and into Yunho's direct line of vision. 

He doesn't want to tell Yeosang that he was running away from the red haired boy. He also doesn't really want his friends knowing about the two of them. And so Yunho just shrugs and settles in his seat. 

"Just wanted some fresh air. And the girl was getting too clingy," he replies. Yeosang nods with a slightly distasteful frown.

“Never really got the appeal of clingy girls,” he sighs. Yunho shoots him a narrow-eyed look. “You don’t get the appeal of girls. Period.” 

Yeosang laughs loudly, shoving his hands in his pockets and pacing around a little. The boy is definitely drunk, if the way he’s stumbling suggests anything. “You’re right.”

There’s another moment of silence and then as Yeoang is opening his mouth to speak, he stops in his tracks and tilts his head. A confused look passes his face and Yunho turns around a little in his seat to see the red haired boy approaching them with long strides over the grass. He looks irritated and oh so gorgeous and Yunho outrights groans and slumps in his seat. 

Yeosang still looks on with confusion as Mingi reaches them. 

“Hey Yeosang,” the red haired boy greets, shifting from foot to foot. Up close he looks more nervous than irritated.

“Hey! I didn’t know you were gonna be here!” Yeosang greets back, smiling widely but still confused.

“Yea, listen. Do you think I could have a moment alone with him?” Mingi asks. 

Yunho groans again, albeit a little quieter. Yeosang looks from Mingi to Yunho and then a mischievous look overcomes his features. His lips are puckered from trying not to smile and he just nods curtly and skips (stumbles) away, giggling to himself. 

And then it’s just the two of them. The night air suddenly feels overly humid and Yunho can feel himself almost shrinking in on himself. There’s so much tension in the air between where he’s sitting and where Mingi is standing and at any moment, either of them might snap. He doesn’t want to do this. He doesn’t want to face the boy again.

But Mingi gives him no choice because he shifts so that he’s directly in line with Yunho’s eyes. “I’m sorry about earlier. I didn’t mean to startle you or upset you.” 

Yunho doesn’t look up at him. He can’t. He knows that if he looks up at him, he’ll break. He’ll spew out every single word that has been bubbling inside his chest for the past five years. He feels like he’s going to combust from all the emotions running through his body.

“It’s been so long since we saw each other. I thought that maybe you would be more–I don’t know–excited about catching up? Maybe you’ve changed and I know I’ve changed too, but we were friends, weren’t we?” Mingi goes on. His voice is deep and there’s a slight quiver to it, maybe from nerves.

And Yunho can’t help but whip his head up at the boy, anger filling his chest and burning him from the inside. “We were friends?” 

The words come quiet and Mingi leans in a little to hear. He looks nervous and is looking him directly in the eyes that Yunho can’t help but notice the slight smudge of eyeshadow in the corners of them. He looks young still, and there’s a genuine kind of innocence that Yunho has seen blinking in the eyes of kids.

The anger in his chest quells just a little. Yes, they were friends. 

“You were my best friend. In case you’ve forgotten, we used to hang out every single day. I sat with you when you were crying on the bare ass concrete floors of your apartment complex the day you moved away,” he starts, but for some reason he can’t seem to go on. Mingi looks at him with his mouth slightly ajar, a flash of emotion passing over his eyes making him furrow his brows.

“I know,” he says and takes a step forward. Yunho stands then, holding his hand up in some sort of panicked caution. 

“I’m sorry. I promise you I haven’t forgotten,” Mingi continues. Yunho tries to take a step backwards as Mingi moves forward again. The lawn chair bumps his calf and clatters to the ground. 

“But you have. You did,” Yunho says. He can’t help the hurt that appears on his face. He casts his eyes down and takes a deep breath, a shaky one. Mingi seems speechless. Yunho had never shown many emotions when they were kids. 

“I didn’t. I would never, I promise you. I’m sorry if I hurt you, Yunho. I just wanted to see if we could be friends again like old times,” Mingi moves forward again, cautiously. Yunho doesn’t try to move away, but he can’t look at the boy’s face. There’s pressure on his chest, a kind of bubbling in his stomach and a dull headache starts to form behind his eyes. 

“I waited for months for you to call me or to text me, Mingi,” he’s shaking his head, a hand coming to cradle himself, wrapping himself with his hands. 

Something in the air shifts between them as Yunho finally lifts his eyes to the red haired boy. There’s something bitter in Mingi’s expression now but Yunho can’t focus on anything but the way his breath quickens. He feels his chest tightening even more. 

He must mumble something because Mingi looks up with questioning eyes, but Yunho is already stumbling away. He heaves breaths as he trips over the toppled over lawn chair and stumbles back over the grass. He skirts around the house, hands clawing at his heaving chest and bolts towards the street. 

The party inside is still raging and he can faintly hear someone calling his name from behind him, but he just runs. Down the road and back over familiar streets until he’s just a block from his apartment. 

When he rounds the corner and the familiar convenience store on the corner bathes him in light, he collapses against a plastic chair just outside and keels over. His breathing is an absolute mess, ragged and stuttered. His hands are shaking and his head is still pounding, but all he can see as he closes his eyes to catch his breath is Mingi looking at him with all the familiarity from four years ago. 

His breaths rattle his chest and the worker at the convenience store comes out to check on him, but he assures the guy that he’s fine and the boy shoots him a worried look but retreats back inside. 

He doesn’t know how much time passes but then suddenly there’s someone slouching down in the plastic chair next to his and rubbing a soothing hand across his back. And for a moment, Yunho is terrified that it’s Mingi. His body goes rigid and he peels his eyes open slowly. He peers at the white converse clad feet and ripped white-wash jeans and immediately relaxes. 

“What the fuck, Yunho. You scared the shit out of us,” San’s voice comes, worried and quieter than usual. He must sense the panic that Yunho feels at the tips of his fingers. 

“I’m sorry,” Yunho breathes out, breath evening out slowly but surely. He stares at the ground and watches as two more pairs of feet join his line of vision. 

“Is everything okay?” Wooyoung’s voice comes from above him. Yunho doesn’t answer, just nods slowly. As his breathing evens out, he’s handed a bottle of water. When he finally lifts his head he finds that the third person is the first year kid, Jongho. He’s staring up at the hazy moon and seems a little out of it. 

“He’s high,” Wooyoung explains and Jongho turns to him with sleepy eyes and asks if he’s okay. Yunho takes some more steadying breaths and nods. 

“I think you were having a panic attack, are you sure you’re okay?” Wooyoung asks again. The three of them are all looking at Yunho with concerned eyes. He’s not sure if he is okay. He’s not sure he’s ever going to be okay, having Song Mingi back in his life and unable to avoid him at all costs. 

He’s also never had a panic attack before but the come down definitely sucks. His hands are still shaking a little and his body feels drained. “I’m not sure.” 

“What happened? Why did you run off like that? Yeosang came screaming at us about catching up to you. He said something about you running away from that Mingi kid?” 

Of course Yeosang had witnessed everything. 

Yunho takes one more steadying breath before pushing himself up onto his feet. The dizziness in his head rushes back up through his spine, but he manages to keep himself up and balanced. San holds out his arms around him for safety and Yunho is thankful for the added support. 

“Think you’ll be able to make it one last block?” Wooyoung asks, coming up to support his left side as San helps on his right. Jongho looks on with an adorable pout on his lips, holding his hands in front of him. “I got you from the back.” 

It’s only a block back to their apartment but Yunho is slightly winded by the time they all climb through the doorway. Jongho doesn’t say anything as he collapses onto the couch and passes out into a dead sleep and Wooyoung just laughs at him and throws a blanket over the boy. San tries to help Yunho into his room but he just shoos him off and lays down on the bed. 

He doesn’t even bother trying to get into more comfortable clothes and pulls his covers over his face. He doesn’t want to think about anything anymore and he doesn’t want to close his eyes, so he stares at the underside of his covers. San stops in to whisper a goodnight with Wooyoung in tow but they don’t close the door to his room, which is probably for the best.

He stares at nothing and listens to the way his heart beats. He pushes away all thoughts and lays in a daze for as long as he can before utter exhaustion drags him into a fitful sleep. He dreams about the red haired boy and his innocent eyes. He dreams about warm summer nights and the feeling of butterflies fluttering in his stomach and being ten years old again. He dreams about never losing Song Mingi, ever again.

When Yunho comes to the next day it’s almost noon. There’s soft chatter coming from the living room and the smell of coffee wafts through his open door. His limbs still feel heavy but he drags himself out of bed and groans at the stiffness of his body and his clothes. Sleeping in jeans would never be comfortable. 

Pulling on a baggy shirt and sweats after a quick shower, Yunho steers himself into the living room to find his two roommates and Jongho chatting over cups of steaming coffee. They all turn to him unceremoniously. San calls a good morning and Jongh comments about it being past noon. Yunho smiles to them all gingerly and heads to the kitchen for some coffee of his own.

The shower had helped to loosen his muscles up a little, but his arms and legs are still slightly sore. He moves a little awkwardly over the counter and plops down on the unoccupied armchair back in the living room and winces at the protest of his muscles. 

“You alright there?” Jongho asks. He looks concerned, eyeing Yunho up and down as if looking for open wounds. 

Taking a long sip of his coffee, Yunho nods. He doesn’t even like coffee all that much. He grimaces at the bitter liquid but goes in for another sip anyway. Maybe it’ll help him wake up some more. 

There’s a not-so-comfortable-but-not-uncomfortable silence hanging in the air, and Yunho can sense the questions looming over them. He looks from Jongho to Wooyoung to San and then drops his eyes to the ground. They’re probably waiting for some kind of explanation, but he doesn’t know if he wants to tell them. Everything that had happened last night was new for him too.

“You don’t have to tell us what happened last night, but if you need to talk about it you know we’re always here to listen,” San says. Maybe he’d sensed Yunho’s hesitance to broach the subject. He’s glad for those words. 

“Yea, sorry about all the fuss last night,” he replies. He can’t help but feel a little guilty for making them worry. They all sit and sip their coffees for a little while longer until their group chat pings. 

**hoes**  
12:27 pm  
**sk8rboi:** you guys wanna meet up for lunch? 

Jongho borrows some of Wooyoung’s clothes and they head out, still cradling the exhaustion that’s lingering in their bodies. Yeosang meets them on campus and they walk in comfortable silence. Yunho notices the glances Yeosang shoots him but he ignores them and trails after his friends. 

The brunch cafe that sits on the west end of campus is teeming with life and students that Yunho vaguely recognizes from the party last night. He catches the eyes of the girl he was dancing with last night but she just smiles and waves at him before turning back to her friends.

They’re seated relatively quickly for how busy the cafe seems to be and menus are handed around just as fast. Coffee and orange juices arrive and Yeosang comments on how Jongho obviously has zero taste buds over the black coffee that the younger orders in comparison to the white mocha that Yeosang orders. The younger just makes a face and shrugs, unbothered by the comment. 

“So what happened last night?” Yeosang piques. San and Wooyoung exchange a look and Yunho feels himself deflating. “Are you alright, at least?” 

This is a question Yunho can answer, although the truthfulness of it could be questioned. “I’m fine. It was nothing, don’t worry about it.” 

Jongho has a look on his face that suggests that it definitely was not ‘nothing’ but he doesn’t comment. San and Wooyoung explain that they just crashed once they got home and Yeosang looks on at all of them with suspicion in his eyes, but doesn’t push. Yunho is grateful he has decent friends.

After the conversation about him fades, he feels slightly refreshed being out with his friends. The clattering throughout the cafe adds a nice background noise to cancel out his thoughts and when the food arrives, Yunho finds that he’s starving. He digs into his toast and a hush falls at their table. 

As San and Wooyoung start feeding each other forkfuls of food (and Jongho squawks in protest), a phone pings and Yeosang goes to check it. Yunho doesn’t pay him any mind as he shoves forkfuls of the slightly salty and sweet bread into his mouth, not until Yeosang looks up at him with weary eyes. 

“What?” he asks and the weariness turns to slight disgust as Yeosang whines at him about not talking with his mouth full. Yunho swallows and sips at his juice with a shrug. 

“It’s Mingi.” 

A different kind of hush falls at their table. There’s a tenseness to it that Yunho finds himself all too familiar with and mildly afraid of. Of course the brunch cafe they’re currently sitting at is located on the same block as the pizza place that Mingi works at and of course Mingi would be working this lunch shift. Luck must really not be on his side.

He contemplates on what his reaction should be. Should he be mad or sad? Maybe he should just ignore it all, but what good would that do? Yunho stares at his toast. There are a lot of thoughts racing through his brain at the moment, but all he can think of is the way Mingi is trying to reach out to him. Is he really trying to become friends again? 

When he raises his eyes from the table, everyone is still looking at him. “Tell him I’m fine,” is what he decides to say and an inaudible breath is let out across his group of friends. Jongho picks up his fork again and Yeosang nods a few times but texts back his reply quickly. 

But Yunho’s appetite is now gone. He pushes the second half of his food around on the plate, picking up a square of toast and then discarding it back down. Jongho seems to notice and he tries to catch his eyes, but Yunho ignores the younger boy and just stares at his plate. 

Brunch comes to an end unceremoniously. They all pay for their food and Yunho doesn’t get his leftovers to-go. When they walk outside, Yunho half expects to run into Mingi, but he knows that the other boy is probably too busy to do such a thing. 

Yeosang and Jongho split from them when they get back to campus, calling goodbyes and heading towards the dorms. The weekend passes in a haze after that. Wooyoung and San are loud and cuddly and Yunho busies himself with getting ahead on his coursework to distract himself from the storm of thoughts churning in his head.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> that's chapter two!  
it's a little longer than chapter 1, but i struggled a little more.  
i guess we'll see what comes next bc this is all i had pre-written yikes.  
thanks for reading and pls leave comments, it helps to motivate me a lot!
> 
> as always, come yell at me on [twitter](https://www.twitter.com/jonghhho) pls!


	3. chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> for reference
> 
> uno : yunho  
mt : san  
young : wooyoung  
sk8rboi: yeosang  
babiE : jongho

When Monday rolls around, Yunho finds himself anxiously walking around campus. It’s only midday and yet he’s seen Mingi three times already. 

The first time is when he gets off the bus in front of the dance department building and the red haired boy is exciting said building. Yunho darts around some bushes and quickly makes a run for the side entrance, beeping through the locked door with his student ID. 

The second time is when he’s walking from his contemporary dance class to biology. He’s trying to remember the topics of last Wednesday’s lecture when he looks up from the ground and locks eyes with the red haired boy across the lawn, coming out of the biology building. He blatantly ignores the eye contact and quickly changes direction. He enters the building from the East wing instead of the North wing and finds that he’s lost. He ends up being ten minutes late to class and sheepishly settles into a seat at the back of the room. 

The third time is when he gets out of biology and decides he needs caffeine. He’s making the trek across campus, sighing at the weight of his dance bag at his shoulder when he spots the red haired boy walking just a few feet in front of him. 

He curses himself for instinctively heading for his usual cafe. He changes course and texts the groupchat to meet him at a different cafe near their usual and hopes that Mingi hadn’t seen him. 

**hoes**  
12:48 pm  
**uno:** i’m going insane  
**sk8rboi:** you’ve always been insane  
**young:** its only 12 pls calm down  
**uno:** he’s EVERYWHERE  
**mt:** who ??  
**uno:** mingi  
**sk8rboi:** care to explain  
**uno:** no  
**mt:** we cant help if you wont tell us  
**uno:** i dont want help  
**uno:** i just wanna scream  
**uno:** its fine  
**uno:** im fine  
**young:** you really are going insane  
**babiE:** when did you guys add me to this?

When he arrives at the cafe, he orders a coffee and sits in the corner with his palms pressed to his eyes. It’s only been half a day and he’s never been more tired in his life. He feels someone settling into the seat across from him and looks up to see Yeosang arranging his stuff nonchalantly. 

“Good afternoon to the insane,” he says without looking up at him, pulling out his lunch in a cute little Gudetama box. Yunho groans and sips his coffee.

Wooyoung and San arrive with Jongho in tow a few moments later. They’re all settled in and Yunho is debating just going home when Wooyoung says, “so are you going to tell us what’s up?” 

Yunho stares around at his friends for a moment. He’s sure he’s not going to tell them anything. He’s sure he can handle everything on his own. He’s so sure, but then he looks at the concerned look in San and Wooyoung’s eyes. He looks at the uneasiness behind Yeosang’s expression and even the genuine curiosity in Jongho’s. 

“I know Mingi from a long time ago,” he starts. Yeosang sits up at this, leaning in closer. 

Yunho starts telling them about meeting Mingi in elementary school and his words just spill out. It’s as if a dam has broken and his brain to mouth filter is definitely not working when he mentions being heartbroken about his first crush. 

The process of talking seems to have some kind of effect on him though. As he tells his story, he feels a lightness sinking into his chest. He’s never told anyone about how he felt about Mingi but talking about things seems to make everything a little easier. 

It’s radio silence when he finishes and everyone seems to be deep in thought. Jongho sips his Americano while looking from one person to the next and Yunho can feel the awkward tension creeping up through his body.

“I get why you don’t really want to see him again,” San says, finally, nodding head head. 

"Yea, that kind of sucks," Wooyoung agrees. Jongho is still silent, looking between the three of them.

Yeosang hums and everyone looks to him. He's got his eyes narrowed and a slight frown lines his face. "It does suck, but maybe you should just talk to him about it? It sounds like it was a big deal to you, so maybe you two can figure out how to put it behind you."

Everyone is gaping at Yeosang. Even Yunho pushes away the embarrassment of spilling his guts and the potential of looking like a love-struck teen and stares at Yeosang in confusion. They've never seen him say such a sensible thing before. 

"Huh, who knew he could be normal." Jongho finally breaks the silence. Yeosang rolls his eyes and sticks his tongue out at the younger boy and everything seems to be back to normal again. 

They don't discuss Yunho's situation anymore after he begs them to just let him be, but there's an itch at the back of his brain telling him that Yeosang is probably right. He knows he's making all of this so much more than it has to be. But a part of him still wants to hold that grudge for the rest of his life and never have to forgive Song Mingi again. Yet a bigger part of him is curious about the boy. Now that he's older and more mature and seemingly devilishly handsome, Yunho can't help but wonder what his life was like and how he feels seeing him after all this time. (A very loud part of his brain wants to know if he's into men, but he tries to push that part away completely.)

An hour later they all bid each other farewell and head in their respective directions. Yeosang rides off on his skateboard and Jongho and Wooyoung head to the bus stop a few blocks away to catch the bus to the other far end of the campus. San waves goodbye to Yunho, claiming he'll be home for dinner, and heads to the psych building. Yunho has a 3pm anatomy class, so he hurries to the building, feeling slightly lighter. 

It's a week later that Yunho sees Yeosang again. He's been sneaking around campus, always on the alert in case he runs into the red haired boy again. After giving Yeosang's words some though, Yunho decides it might be easiest for him to ignore the situation until it comes up again. 

He's spent the weekend preparing for the dance team auditions with San and Wooyoung, trading ideas and hoping to whatever higher power that Mingi wouldn't be in the building. When Friday rolls around, they're all ready and excited to be getting back into the routine of dance.

Yunho is decidedly anxious when he walks through the doors of the practice room following behind his two roommates, but he's immediately greeted by a friendly face. 

“Hongjoong, what are you doing here?” San yells and throws himself at the third year. His hair is much darker than when Yunho saw him last semester. He looks a little tired but glad to see all of them.

“Just killing some time with the roommate, how has you guys’ semester been going?” the older replies. 

The four of them launch into conversation and Wooyoung practically bursts his vocal chords when Seonghwa walks in, wheeling giant amplifier into the practice room. Seonghwa is now the captain of the dance team and Hongjoong is Seonghwa’s non-dancer roommate. They only know Hongjoong because he mixes their performance pieces for them and is Seonghwa’s roommate.

“Are you guys excited for the year? I mean, if you get on the team of course,” Seonghwa cheerfully jibes. Wooyoung huffs in feigned annoyance but gives in after Seonghwa showers him with apologies. 

The practice room is teeming with people now, some acquainted and some new. He bumps fists with a few familiar faces and makes small talk when the door of the practice room opens once more. Yeosang comes strolling in like he owns the place and a beat later, Yunho locks eyes with Mingi as the red haired boy follows behind Yeosang. 

It’s a strange sensation, knowing that other people finally know about the two of them. Knowing that Mingi wants to befriend him again and knowing that Yunho isn’t ready for something like that just yet. The red haired boy looks away as Yeosang weaves through people toward their group. 

Yunho can distinctly hear his blood rushing through his ears as they stop just a few feet away. Yeosang introduces Mingi to Seonghwa and Hongjoong and starts a conversation about something but Yunho hasn’t been able to pick up on anything. He just looks at Mingi. 

He takes in the boy’s pointed nose and slightly tired eyes and the slightest pout of his lips. He realizes once again that they’re basically the same height and he appreciates the broadness of the boy’s shoulders that taper to a slim waist. When he drags his eyes back up, Mingi is looking at him too. 

“How are you?” the boy asks, and Yunho finds that he likes that voice–deep and calming and stirring something in his chest.

“Good,” he answers. Mingi doesn’t pry, he just nods and they turn away from each other just as Seonghwa announces that they’ll be starting in five minutes. 

They learn a piece that once of their choreographers put together over the summer and Yunho is sweating just thirty minutes in. He can’t help but glance at Mingi through the mirror throughout the class and appreciates the boy’s clean execution and the power behind his moves. 

They get sectioned off into groups and there’s an evaluation of the choreography. Yunho is grouped off with San, Wooyoung, and two other dancers and is pleased when everyone seems to have gotten the choreography thoroughly. He puts his own flares into the moves and earns some whoops and hollers and Wooyoung pulls him into a bear hug when their group finishes. 

When Mingi and Yeosang’s group performs, Yunho finds himself in awe of the boy’s expressions. They way he mouths the words he knows and seems to be one hundred percent into the song has Yunho gaping. The rest of the onlookers also seem to be entranced as they exclaim at the appropriate times, even Wooyoung cheers when Mingi adds some hip thrusts to a particular section of the choreography. 

They move on to a cypher, to get people loosened up to do their solos that they’ve prepared. Seonghwa starts off with an easy combo and people jump in and out as they see fit. Yeosang goes into the circle with some nasty footwork and then finishes off with a laugh and as he retreats back out of the circle, he points decidedly at Yunho. 

Yunho likes freestyle. He’s not necessarily the best at it, but he knows how to throw some moves and earn a cheer. He goes in for a tutting combo and emerges through some smooth body rolls and when he looks up he’s face to face with Mingi. 

The red haired boy smiles and follows Yunho into the circle as he moves back to the crowd and while he tries to catch his breath, he finds that he can’t look away. 

Mingi is powerful to say the least. His movements are sharp but rugged and he throws himself into each combo with so much force, Yunho can’t keep his mouth shut. Everyone is hollering as Mingi throws himself to the floor into some breakdancing moves. When he’s finished Seonghwa cuts the music as everyone crowds around the red haired boy, complimenting him on the freestyle. 

Yunho locks eyes with Mingi as everyone disperses around them to prepare for their solos. They don’t exchange any words, but Yunho feels the blood rushing to his cheeks as he nods. He’s not sure what he’s nodding to though, whether it’s in acknowledgement to the amazing freestyle or the unspoken relationship they’re agreeing on.

Solos go by quickly because Yunho’s mind is preoccupied. He watches people go through routines or freestyles and goes through his own set in kind of a haze. He catches Mingi’s eyes a few times through the whole minute and a half of his set and feels himself pushing a little harder hitting each beat a little more precisely each time. 

When the last solo has wrapped, Seonghwa thanks everyone for coming out and to look out for texts in the next week. The room empties slowly. 

Yunho picks up his bag of stuff and joins Wooyoung and San when Hongjoong finds them. He congratulates them on making the cut (“I just know, okay.”). 

“What are you guys doing tonight? Any plans?” The three of them shake their heads. Hongjoong then calls over Yeosang and Mingi comes too. 

“Hey new kid, you’re invited too. Seonghwa and I are throwing a small party at our apartment. Just a few people, you know, nothing crazy. You guys should all come,” Hongjoong explains. Wooyoung whoops and San raises his hand. “Can we bring a new kid too?” 

“Sure, just keep it pleasant,” Hongjoong replies and walks away. 

Yunho can feel a slight tension surrounding the five of them as they walk out of the dance building together. Yunho sees San glance back at him a couple of times and Yeosang has an out of place smile on his lips. Somehow Yunho ends up walking next to Mingi and although it’s a short trip to the front of the building, he feels the awkwardness engulfing him from the inside out. 

“We’ll see you guys later then?” San asks, Yeosang and Mingi both nod.

As they’re waiting to catch the bus back to their apartment, Yunho can’t help but feel like the anger that he’s held onto has faded. He’s always resented Mingi for leaving him behind and a part of him resented him even more for seeming to have coped so well without him. But being in the same space with him and seeing him after having let out his thoughts to his friends, he finds that the anger and frustration has dissipated. 

“You okay?” Wooyoung asks as the bus pulls to a stop in front of them. 

“Yea,” he answers, and part of him thinks it’s true.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry for being a day late to update!  
i was out of town all weekend (for superm in dc) so i hadn't had much time to write, but it's here now!  
it's really short and kind of a filler but things will happen next chapter, i promise.  
as always, please leave comments on what you think so far bc it helps to motivate me!  
thanks!
> 
> always come yell at me on twitter, [jonghhho](http://www.twitter.com/jonghhho)!


	4. chapter 4

It’s probably an understatement for Yunho to say that he’s nervous. After the events of the last party, he’s not so sure it’s a good idea to be going to another one which he knows Mingi will for sure be attending. He’s about to say so to Wooyoung who’s scrolling through his phone on the couch when the front door opens and Jongho walks in. He’s got his hair parted and split down the middle with a purple button down on over tight black jeans. 

He’s got three boxes of fried chicken and stops in the entryway, holding the bags out to him. “Can you take these?” 

Yunho nods and hurries over to take the food. 

“How did you get in?” Yunho asks, watching the younger pull off his expensive looking suede shoes. 

“Wooyoung gave me the code after telling me to pick up the chicken on the way over,” Jongho replies. He’s got a pout on his lips as he stalks past Yunho and drops a receipt in Wooyoung’s lap. 

“Thanks, baby!” Wooyoung calls as Yunho sets down the chicken. None of the rest of them are dressed yet, but it’s only eight and the party doesn’t start until 10:30.

“How’d the auditions go?” Jongho asks, unpacking the boxes and splitting the side sets of radish evenly. 

Wooyoung explains to Jongho about the auditions. He tells him about the crazy cypher and some of the cool solo auditions. San comes out of his and Wooyoung’s shared bedroom with wet hair and a pair of joggers on. 

“Woah there, this is a shared living space and I’m the baby, as you all like to put it. Please put clothes on,” Jongho says, a grimace on his face. San looks around at all of them and then darts back into the room. When he emerges again, he’s wearing Wooyoung’s favorite hoodie. 

“You don’t even live here,” San retaliates, as he picks up a drumstick and bites into it with force. Wooyoung laughs at his boyfriend’s antics before kissing him on the cheek. 

“There’s chicken grease on your lips!” San shouts, wiping away at the spot. Jongho rolls his eyes.

Yunho sits and digs into the chicken, weighing the pros and cons of going to the party. He does want to hang out with his friends. He wants to catch up with Seonghwa and Hongjoong more and half of him actually wants to see Mingi again.

But he doesn’t want to truly face Mingi. He’s not ready to completely delve into whatever he’s feeling or whatever happened years ago. Just, not yet. 

With the chicken cleared out and their stomachs full, each of them heads to get dressed. Yunho hovers for a little in the living room, thoroughly cleaning the remains of their dinner and talking to Jongho about some things before the younger asks, “Are you okay to go out with us?” 

Yunho hesitates. He’s not sure he is quite alright. He thinks of the events of the last party and shudders a little at the memory of being confronted with Mingi’s presence. He remembers how caged he’d felt and how exhausting the the whole ordeal had been, mentally and physically. Jongho seems to watch him closely as he contemplates things in his head.

When Yunho finally stands from the couch, he feels a tugging in his chest and a tingling in the tips of his ears. He might not be ready but he doesn't want to turn away from this anymore. He wants to face Mingi and maybe even make up with him if he can, because after seeing him and being in the same room with him and understanding that they've both grown up, he misses the other in an odd way that he's not really sure he understands. 

The party is already underway when Yunho arrives, following a very hyper San and Wooyoung and a slightly nervous Jongho. Seonghwa hadn't been kidding when he says a hangout because as they enter through the kitchen and into the living room, they're greeted with people lounging and talking instead of blaring music and bodies grinding. 

Hongjoong welcomes them all with a wide smile and tries to pass them the joint he has in his hands. San and Wooyoung steer clear, never having had any good experiences with weed. Yunho also kindly declines the offer but raises an eyebrow when the older turns to Jongho and the younger gladly takes a hit. There's an odd moment where Hongjoong is just staring at the younger, smile slowly reducing to something a little softer. Yunho distinctly feels uncomfortable when Jongho blows the smoke into the older's face and they laugh together like they've known each other for years. 

"Hongjoong," the older holds out a polished hand. Jongho takes the smaller hand and another small hit of the joint before replying with his name and smoke curing out of the corners of his lips. 

It all seems a little sensual and Yunho excuses himself quickly. Seonghwa welcomes him with a hug and thrusts a beer into his hand when he enters the kitchen again. San and Wooyoung seem to be raiding the fridge and Yunho shouts encouragement at them, much to Seonghwa's dismay, and goes back out to the living room. 

He's sandwiched on the biggest couch between Hongjoong and a boy from their dance team when he spots Yeosang coming into the room with Mingi in tow. As if on cue, Mingi turns his eyes toward him. Yunho holds the red haired boy's gaze before holding up his hand in greeting. The gesture seems awkward and Yunh immediately feels an embarrassed flush start creeping into his ears, but Mingi smiles and waves a hand at him as well. 

It's a little while later, that Yunho finally manages to get close enough to Mingi to actually say 'hi'. The other boy seems a little taken aback but he smiles kindly. 

They get distracted by a number of things after that. Seonghwa brings out a giant tray of jello shots and hands them out to almost everyone. Yunho almost gags at the amount of vodka he can taste in his. Yeosang grabs Wooyoung by the hips at one point and a filthy dance occurs in the middle of the living room. San and Wooyoung disappear for a good thirty minutes afterwards and no one really questions it.

It's after a kid vomits into the kitchen sink and a round of awkward karaoke that Yunho realizes Jongho and Hongjoong have disappeared. Wooyoung and San are off somewhere and Seonghwa and Yeosang are having a loud conversation in the kitchen.

Yunho gets up and Mingi looks up at him with questioning eyes. He just waves the other off and heads to Hongjoong's room but it's bathed in darkness and no one is there. Seonghwa's room is occupied by San and Wooyoung who turn to him with dopey smiles and ask him to join. Yunho chuckles and then leaves the couple be. 

He pulls out his phone as he heads for the front door, pulling on his shoes hastily. When he stands back up, he finds Mingi coming toward him, worry evident in his eyes. 

"Where are you going?" 

Yunho stops in his tracks as he takes in the way Mingi shifts from foot to foot. He looks at the slight sparkle in his eyes and Yunho hasn’t wanted to comfort someone so bad in such a long time. He remembers Mingi crying in the hallway, smiling for his friend who was hurting. 

“I’m just going to find Joong hyung and Jongho,” he explains shoving the rest of his shoe on. Mingi’s expression seems to soften just a little before going back into full worry mode. 

“You don’t think they’re out on the streets or anything?” Yunho shakes his head. 

Mingi follows him out of the apartment at Yunho dials Hongjoong’s number. It’s a few seconds that stretch on for longer than it should, but the older picks up with a giggle. “Yunho!”

“Where did you go? Are you with Jongho?” Mingi looks at him with his eyebrows raised. 

“Yea! We’re upstairs and the lights are so pretty! Come upstairs!” 

Yunho can hear Jongho in the background being drowned out by wind and other ambient noises. “What do you mean upstairs?”

Hongjoong and Jongho are both yelling into the phone now and somewhere in close distant, Yunho can _hear_ them. 

“The roof?” Mingi asks. Yunho tells them to wait for them and hangs up. He and Mingi head for the stairs and take them two at a time. He’s not necessarily worried that they’ll do anything stupid, he just doesn’t want anything to happen.

Mingi follows close behind him and Yunho almost feels nostalgic. He remembers running up the stairs of Mingi’s apartment complex. He remembers bursting through the front door of the other’s house and Mingi’s mom yelling about their dirty shoes being kicked off haphazardly. 

When they make it to the roof, Yunho immediately spots Hongjoong curled into Jongho’s side, laughing and pointing at the odd shapes that the stars are making. He distinctly feels like he’s intruding again. Mingi slides into the space beside him and when he looks to him, Mingi’s also looking at him with a crooked smile. 

“Are they hitting it off, or what?” Yunho smiles.

“Yunho! New boy!” Hongjoong yells when he spots them. Jongho has a dazed kind of look on his face but smiles wide when he looks up at them too. The tips of their noses and ears are red from the chilled wind, but they look comfortable. Yunho has never seen Hongjoong like this with anyone before.

“You guys alright?” Mingi asks, squatting down to eye level with the two who are basically splayed on the concrete floor. Hongjoong nods and then giggles, pointing at the lights of a plane passing over them. 

“Seven!” He shouts. 

It shocks Yunho when he sees Jongho lean in to kiss Hongjoong square on the lips. The older can’t stop giggling but accepts the kiss, pulling Jongho in for another longer one. Mingi glances up at Yunho, confusion written all over his face.

Yunho and Mingi sit with the other two for a while. Hongjoong tells them about a song he’s working on and also tells them that Seonghwa asked him to mix some music for their upcoming showcase.

Jongho lazily talks about the musical he’s starring in with a smile on his face and Yunho doesn’t miss the twinkling in Hongjoong’s eyes as he watches Jongho talk. It’s an odd thing, to see the older so enamoured by the younger. 

When a particularly strong gust of cold air bristles around them, Yunho feels himself shiver. He pushes his hands into the pockets of his jeans a little further and then feels a shuffling to his side. Mingi’s shoulder and thigh presses gently against his own and when he turns to look at the red haired boy, he’s a little startled by their proximity. 

His glasses are riding low on the bridge of his nose and his lips are a little chapped, but he looks good under the darkness of the night, illuminated by the ambient light drifting from neon signs and streetlights. 

“Eight!” Hongjoong yells from beside him, but Yunho can’t look away from Mingi. The other hasn’t looked up yet. He’s not sure if he even knows that Yunho’s staring. He sees Jongho kiss Hongjoong again out of the corner of his eye, but Yunho still doesn’t know how to look away from Mingi’s face. 

When the red haired boy finally looks up at him, Yunho doesn’t know what to do. He doesn’t move or blink or pretend like he isn’t staring. He just keeps watching as Mingi’s eyes seek his. 

“I’m sorry,” the other whispers and Yunho is finally broken from his trance. He finds himself looking for something in Mingi’s eyes too, and he finds it–the sincerity and the sadness. 

“Me too,” Yunho replies. 

"Nine," Hongjoong says. 

Mingi smiles at him with all of his teeth and Yunho finds himself laughing. His laugh mingles with Hongjoong's giggles and eventually all four of them are laughing. Mingi's shoulder presses a little harder into his but Yunho doesn't mind. They still have a lot to say and a lot to unpack but as he watches Mingi's shoulders shake from laughter, he thinks that maybe they really can be alright. 

When the four of them return to the apartment, it’s eerily quiet. Yeosang is lying on the couch in the living room, changed into a t-shirt and sweatpants and fiddling with his phone. He looks up at the four of them when they stumble in and then wiggles his eyebrows at Yunho. 

“I see you guys are still alive,” he comments, dropping his phone on his chest. He sits up and collects a blanket that that Seonghwa presumably left out for him. The door to the oldest’s room is closed and an odd sort of tension fills the air. 

“San and Wooyoung left ten minutes ago. They said you could probably find your way home better than they could,” Yeosang says to Yunho. Three of them then turn to Hongjoong who’s pushing Jongho into his room and then closing it behind them with a wink. 

“Maybe I don’t wanna stay here,” Yeosang says and then glances at Seonghwa’s door and then rolls his eyes. 

“I gotta stay for that dummy,” he finishes and lays back down, throwing the blanket over himself. 

Mingi turns to him. “I guess we’ll head home?” 

It’s chilly, still, when they get back outside. Mingi lives on campus and Yunho’s apartment is close enough to walk to. 

They keep a respectful distance as they walk slowly and an almost comfortable silence shrouds them. Yunho isn’t sure what he should say, or if he should say anything at all. Mingi walks a couple of steps ahead of him, hands in his pockets and head bowed a little. 

They’re stopped at an intersection when Mingi looks up at him. “Do you wanna maybe take a walk?” 

He nods to the small park across the street. There’s a small walking path and a playground in the middle. Yunho nods and Mingi takes the lead, steering them across the road and toward the playground. 

It’s awfully quiet still as they slowly make their way around the park. There aren’t very many cars on the road and not a single soul can be seen. Yunho feels the tips of his ears numbing from the cold, but he doesn’t mind. He just watches Mingi as he leads them around the park. 

They don’t stop until Mingi has them at the edge of the playground. He steers himself toward the swings and takes a seat. It’s a pretty funny sight seeing the tall boy fold himself to sit in a small swing made for children. Yunho does the same and imagines that anyone passing might think it’s a funny sight too. 

“I just wanted to say that I’m sorry again,” Mingi starts after a few moments. He’s fiddling with his fingers in his lap again, a nervous habit. 

“You’ve apologized enough, Mingi,” Yunho replies. And it’s true. It seems like every time they see each other one of them is apologizing to the other. “These words are gonna haunt us.” 

Mingi chuckles and then it’s silent again. The metal links of the swing set are cold in Yunho’s hands. He still doesn’t know what to say. Should he ask him how he’s been doing or ask him why he never reached out to him? In the end Mingi makes the decision for him. 

“I didn’t know how to get in contact with you after we moved away,” Mingi says. He’s still looking down at his lap. “Your parents had just gotten you that phone and I couldn’t remember the number for the life of me.” 

He’s smiling slightly now, thumbing at the inner seam of his pant leg. Yunho opens his mouth and then closes it because Mingi is right. Of course as soon as he’d gotten that phone he always called Mingi using it, but Mingi hadn’t ever had a cellphone. 

“A month after we moved, my dad left.” 

Yunho gasps. He feels his brain reeling, trying to make sense of the words Mingi is saying. 

“It was weird, but it’s fine now. He still sends me money on my birthday, can you believe it?” There’s a bitterness in Mingi’s voice that makes Yunho sad. Of course, he hadn’t known any of this information, but that doesn’t mean he doesn’t feel guilty for resenting Mingi so much. 

“I’m sorry,” Yunho says. Mingi looks up at him then and his face breaks out into a smile.

“You don’t have to apologize,” he says. Yunho feels himself smiling too. 

“Yea well, I am.” He turns to face Mingi fully. 

“And I’m sorry for resenting you so much. I just didn’t know. I thought that maybe you didn’t care about me, which I know now wasn’t true and you have a lot on your plate but I couldn’t see past my own emotions.” The words spill out of him, but this time like a steady fountain. He feels tension in his shoulders dissipating and sees Mingi relaxing a little more as well. 

“It’s okay. It was probably really shitty on your part too,” Mingi reassures. 

They sit in silence for a little longer, neither knowing what to say or what to do. Half of Yunho wants to run away again and hide from Mingi but the other half of him wants to never leave Mingi’s side again. He never wants Mingi to leave _his_ side again. 

“We’d better get going for real now.” 

Mingi’s voice breaks Yunho from his train of thought. He’s not sure if it’s just his imagination, but he swears he sees the subtle hints of daybreak off in the distance. When he tries to check the time, he realizes his phone is dead. 

“Yea.” 

The apartment is quiet when Yunho finally makes it back. He tries to be as silent as he can as he removes his shoes and grabs a bottle of water from the kitchen before retreating to his room. 

He changes into a t-shirt and shorts before climbing into his bed and plugging in his dead phone. When it boots back up, it vibrates a few times with messages from Yeosang and Seonghwa and even one from Jongho. 

He tells himself he’ll check on the well-being of his friends in the morning and settles into his covers. When he feels himself drifting off, one last text comes through. The vibrations startle him, and Yunho’s eyes fly open in the darkness of his room. 

When he looks at the message, he sees that it’s from an unknown number. 

**xxxx**  
4:49 am  
_i asked yeosang to give me your number a while ago  
thank you for today._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i'm so so so sorry for the late update y'all T.T  
i have no excuses really other than i work a lot more these days?  
anyway, i'll try to update quicker next time, but no promises. 
> 
> also, idk how this hongjoong/jonho thing happened, but it did and i'm really not mad abt it.   
don't worry tho, there's still more hongjoong/seonghwa coming later.
> 
> please leave me nice comments because it really does help in motivating me to write!  
and as always, come yell at me on twitter, [jonghhho](http://www.twitter.com/jonghhho)


	5. chapter 5

Yunho doesn't expect to see Mingi until dance practice, but when Yeosang begs them to go to their actual usual cafe, Yunho gives in. He enters the cafe a little cautiously but immediately spots Mingi at a table, apron draped over his hips and looking like some manga character. Yeosang chuckles at him a little and when he stumbles on a ledge, at that exact moment, Mingi looks up at them.

Yunho feels the embarrassment creeping into his ears but he straightens up and hastily throws up a hand in greeting. Everything feels forced, but a bemused smile glazes over Mingi’s lips and he waves in return. 

Things seem to fall into place after that day. Mingi comes along to hang out more often within their friend group, finally fitting in strangely well with San and Wooyoung while playing Super Smash or with Hongjoong as they discuss American rappers. Yunho finds himself more and more comfortable in Mingi’s presence. He finds himself smiling and laughing more and feeling distinctly carefree.

There are times when it still feels a little forced. When he and Mingi are left alone for even a couple of minutes, it’s tense but not uncomfortable. They just haven’t figured out just how to be around each other again, and Yunho can respect that. 

There are times though, when everything feels like it had never changed. When San and Wooyoung show signs of cheating during monopoly and Yunho and Mingi catch on and in turn cheat together to bankrupt the other couple. They cackle about it for two whole days, exchanging fist bumps every time they see each other on campus and making sure to rub it in Wooyoung’s face whenever they can.

And while his and Mingi’s relationship seems to be coiling back into a tighter thread every day, something seems to be off with Seonghwa and Hongjoong. 

Seonghwa doesn’t comment much on Hongjoong during practice and Hongjoong never seems to hover for longer than necessary when Seonghwa shows up to their group activities. It always leaves the rest of them feeling a little odd and Jongho always seems to sink lower in his seat when these things occur. 

“What’s wrong with them?” Wooyoung asks as he watches Seonghwa walk out of the cafe one Friday night and Hongjoong awkwardly shuffle to the bathroom. Jongho sinks into his seat once again, closing his eyes and looking sullen.

“What do you mean?” Yeosang asks, sipping his hot chocolate. Ever since the weather started cooling, Yeosang had taken to the chocolatey drink as his go-to. 

Mingi shuffles to their table a moment later, nodding toward the vacant figure of Seonghwa leaving and a curious look in his eyes. Yunho feels his eyes wandering over Mingi’s fading red hair and the black rimmed glasses he’s got on today. He lingers at the way one the boy’s collarbones peeks from just underneath the unbuttoned bit of his striped shirt and then he looks away, completely scandalized by his own actions. 

“You can’t tell me none of you have ever noticed?” Yeosang says again, flatly. He’s looking around at the bunch of them, a disgruntled look on his face. Jongho peeks up from under his bangs and sits up a little straighter. 

“Tell me or I will end you,” the youngest says matter of factly and then with a defeated look in his eyes, he pouts out, “I feel like I’m the reason they’re being so distant with each other, but I don’t know what I did wrong.” 

It’s a little early to outright say that Jongho and Hongjoong are dating. They’re constantly going on dates and always hanging around each other. Yunho catches the sight of a brutal hickey just underneath the neckline of Jongho’s shirt once and almost gags. (Jongho begs him to not tell anyone else.)

Yeosang dramatically rolls his eyes and shifts a little closer to all of them. He leans forward with his eyes darkening and then takes a look at all of them again. Mingi leans in over all of them but he’s standing just behind Yunho and he can feel the proximity ebbing away at his sanity. 

He feels the red haired boy’s warmth and the slight hum travelling through his chest when Yeosang’s eyes flutter over the two of them. He can feel the few inches of space that’s left between them and the prickling of the boy’s hand on the back of his chair. He feels tingly all over, shivering a little at the sensation. 

Yeosang throws his hands up and finally takes a long breath before unceremoniously saying, “Seonghwa has been in love with Hongjoong since they were in high school.”

There’s a stunned silence rippling through their little huddle. Yunho exchanges a look with Wooyoung who is wide-eyed and jaw-dropped. San seems to be processing the news by being very still. Emotions cycle through his expression before he finally lands on confused again. Everyone is still reeling until Jongho abruptly stands from his seat.

The clanging of the metal chair is what draws their attention and they all turn to Jongho who’s looking straight ahead with terrified eyes. When they turn, they realize Hongjoong is standing just behind San, staring at the youngest with his mouth slightly agape. 

“Joong-hyung,” Yeosang starts, getting up from his seat and stepping toward the older, but Hongjoong moves quickly. He’s dodged Yeosang’s approach and is grabbing his bag, fleetingly laying a hand at Jongho’s shoulder before whispering something in the younger’s ear and then running out of the cafe. 

Jongho stands there shell-shocked, staring after the older. Everyone bristles a little and then watches as Jongho sits back down looking at everything but at the rest of them. 

Yunho wonders what Hongjoong has said to the other. He wonders what Jongho is feeling; what Hongjoong is feeling. He wonders if Seonghwa is hurting. As he hears Wooyoung ask if it’s really true, he feels a palm against his shoulder and stills as Mingi leans in to whisper, “Gotta clock out, be back soon.” 

The red haired boy slips away unnoticed and Yunho feels himself shivering again from the proximity. His right ear is tingling from having the boy’s breath ghosting over it but he tries to shake it off.

“I’m not lying,” Yeosang combats, rolling his eyes for the hundredth time that day. 

“Then how come no one knew? No one but you? What if you’re ruining their friendship as we speak? Oh my god, if you’re doing this as a prank and the two of them get hurt-” Yeosang’s face breaks out into disbelief. 

San hushes Wooyoung before the other can go any further, and if Yunho hadn’t known that the three of them were friends for years before this, than he’d be worried for their friendship right about now. 

“I think maybe Yeosang’s right,” Jongho’s voice comes, small and a little wobbly. No one else hears it but Yunho who immediately turns to the younger. 

He’s staring at the table between them all, a grave expression on his face. He looks contemplative. No one turns to him. No one even hears the younger, but Yunho scoots a little closer to the boy, taking Hongjoong’s now empty seat, and lays what he hopes is a reassuring hand over the younger’s shoulder.

“You okay?” he asks. Jongho’s eyes turn up to his. There’s a sort of determination behind them, a sort of calm that he doesn’t expect. 

“Yea,” is all he says. 

There’s a clamour of noise as Yeosang and Wooyoung argue about the newfound information and then just as Yunho sees Mingi sidling back to their group, Yeosang breaks. The red haired boy flinches a little as Yeosang throws up his arms in defeat. 

“Fine, you wanna know why I know?” His tone is a little menacing as he stares Wooyoung down, anger evident in his expression. “I’ll tell you.” 

What comes out of his mouth next isn’t something any of them are expecting. “I slept with him on more than a few occasions last year. After the second time, he apologized to me because he felt like he was using me to get over Hongjoong.” 

There’s an almost eerie silence as they all let the words sink in. Yunho feels his mind searching for all of those times Yeosang had disappeared in the night after parties or even during the day. He’s always assumed it was random flings and the ever present booty call, not Seonghwa of all people. Jongho is the first to break the silence. 

“You said on more than a few occasions?” he asks, raising an eyebrow. 

At this, Yeosang shrugs. “We didn’t really see a reason to stop. Being friends with benefits isn’t that crazy to you, is it?” 

There’s an explosion of questions from San and Wooyoung which Yunho decides he probably doesn’t want to hear so he turns his attention to Jongho who seems to be buried in his own thoughts again. 

It’s not until a few moments later that he feels someone settle into his previous seat. There’s no more apron adorning Mingi’s hips as he sets his bag down by his feet and grimaces at the loudness of the trio beside him. Yunho catches himself staring a little too longingly at the way Mingi’s slacks hug his thighs. He turns away almost ashamed. 

“Wild night, huh,” Mingi says, voice deep and a little tired. Jongho breathes out a sigh at those words. Yunho just nods and forces himself to act natural as he watches the others bickering. 

Jongho leaves only a few minutes later, claiming to be too tired to deal with much. Yunho can almost foresee the youngest heading in the opposite direction from the campus dorms but doesn’t make to comment on it as they call goodbyes to him. 

As the trio’s conversation dies down, Yeosang is the next to announce his departure. He swiftly pulls on his jacket and then shoots daggers at San and Wooyoung before calling a goodnight to Yunho and Mingi _only_ and walking out of the door. 

That leaves the four of them, but only for a little while longer. San and Wooyoung are quick to make an exit and when Yunho goes to follow them, San holds up a hand with an almost sheepish smile.

“We don’t want to sexile you, but Wooyoung’s been really stressed all week and well…” he trails off. Yunho groans and rolls his eyes as he waves the couple off. He makes a show of being disgusted and angry until they’re out of the cafe doors. 

And then there were two. 

Yunho fidgets a little as he and Mingi sit in silence for a few beats. He should probably ask someone to stay the night at their place, but according to recent events, Seonghwa and Hongjoong’s apartment is a most definite ‘no’. Jongho would probably not be in his dorm and so that leaves Yeosang. 

He’s never stayed at Yeosang’s dorm before. He doesn’t even know where the kid lives. He’s about to pull out his phone when Mingi speaks up. 

“You can stay at mine if you need a place for tonight.”

Yunho’s hand freezes in his pocket. He looks over at the red haired boy who’s looking at him with raised brows. And of course, Yunho’s mind plays over a million different scenarios of what might go down if he says yes and a million more of what might happen if he says no. He contemplates between absolutely wanting to spend the night at Mingi’s and being abysmally terrified of being that close to Mingi in an enclosed space. And then his mind wanders into some truly bashful places and he finally screeches to a stop before he can let himself be caught thinking such things. 

“Uhm, would that be okay?” Yunho tentatively asks. He removes his hand from his pocket and turns to face the other boy a little better. Mingi just presses his lips together and shrugs. 

“It’s up to you, but my place is open.” 

Yunho drums nervously at his leg as he follows Mingi up four flights of stairs. The latter claims that the elevator more often gets stuck than actually takes people to their floor, so he never utilizes it. The building is laid out similarly to Yunho’s own apartment complex. It’s a little on the older side and the stairs are well trodden but the hallway is clean and anyone they pass seems to be friendly enough. 

They pass door after door when they arrive on the fourth floor and finally stop at the last apartment on this end of the hallway. Yunho focuses on the Thomas the Train stickers littering the linoleum in between Mingi’s door and his neighbor’s as the other punches in the code and the door chimes open. 

Truthfully Yunho doesn’t know what to expect when he enters the foyer. There’s an impressive shoe collection stacked up to almost his head in clear shoe boxes in the entryway and Mingi ducks his head a little as he pulls out a second set of indoor slippers for Yunho to wear. 

“Nice collection,” Yunho comments, slipping into the slippers and following Mingi into what he presumes to be the living room. 

When the lights flick on, Yunho is at first impressed with how clean everything is. The red couch on one side of the room looks almost brand new and there isn't a single line of dust on the black TV stand. Then Yunho realizes Mingi probably isn't home much. In between working two jobs and being a full time student, he always found time to hang out with their little group of friends as well as dance. When he turns to Mingi, the red haired boy is staring at him, an unreadable expression lining his face. 

"What?" Yunho asks. He raises a conscious hand toward his face, making sure there isn't anything on it. At that Mingi chuckles.

"I don't know. It just feels a little surreal, having you here in my apartment." 

Yunho can say the same. It doesn't escape him, the fact that just a month ago he was avoiding Mingi like the plague. "Yea," is what he answers and then lowers his bag next to the couch. 

"The couch pulls out into a bed, although it's probably not the most comfortable," Mingi says, gesturing toward the space and then shifting a little on his feet. He's nervous. 

In a moment of absolute dim-wittedness, Yunho replies, "Are you trying to take me to bed already?" 

Mingi sputters and throws his arms up defensively while Yunho laughs, full bodied and loud. He throws himself against the couch and slides to the floor, clutching at his abdomen. The red haired boy watches him with his own smile on his face, slowly shrinking the distance between them and finally coming to settle comfortably on the couch. 

Once he's done laughing, Yunho looks up at the boy. There's a slightly embarrassed flush on his cheeks, probably, but he can't bring himself to care. This is the comfortable friendship he remembers from years back. The two of them sharing laughs and jokes and not worrying about anything more. Yunho catches the glint in Mingi's eyes, the need to say more than he should rests on the tip of his tongue.

A beat passes where they both just look into each other's eyes. A silent conversation is exchanged and an understanding passes between them, yet Yunho isn't sure exactly what about. He just feels something in the atmosphere shift and watches as Mingi's eyes soften. They still haven't said a word and he's still sitting on the floor, but something changes. 

When Mingi breaks the silence, it's not jarring. His voice is low, almost at a whisper. "Do you think they'll work it out?" 

He's referring to Seonghwa and Hongioong.

"I don't know, but I hope they do." A beat.

"Do you think Jongho and Hongjoong are dating?" 

"I don't think they're dating yet. I don't know if they're gonna be dating after this incident."

Mingi looks at him again, lips pressed together. "They make each other happy though, you saw it." 

And yes, Yunho had seen it. Although they were both high and it had been an oddly intimate experience, he'd seen firsthand how well they clicked. "Yea," he replies again. 

And then there's a cautious sort of silence that stretches out. Mingi fiddles with his fingers and Yunho's leg bounces uncomfortably, an old habit he can't seem to break. He doesn't know where to take the conversation from there. He doesn't know if he should get up from the floor or if he should excuse himself to the bathroom to gather his thoughts.

When he finally decides he might do the latter, he looks up at Mingi and all resolve flies out the window. The boy is leaning back against the cushions now, long legs spread and head tilted back. His eyes are closed and his glasses rest low on the bridge of his nose and just something about him looks so inviting. Yunho's mind supplies him with images of things he wants to do at that moment, some innocent and some outright filthy. 

It's Mingi's voice that snaps him out of his thoughts. "I never told you this."

A pause.

Yunho finds himself holding his breath. Nothing good ever comes out of that expression. At least, not to his knowledge or experience.

"I wasn't ever going to tell you this." 

There's a tiny voice screaming at him to run away and hide. 

"I liked you so much." 

It feels as if every single function in his body has stopped working. White noise fills his brain as Yunho lets the words bounce around in his head. He feels his chest tighten a little, not necessarily in a bad way, just in an odd sort of way. He hears his own words of affirmation in the depths of his brain echo back, wanting so bad to project and to reciprocate. He feels the need to touch the other boy, hands seeming to ache for something to hold. And then he feels the churning in his stomach. The roiling of the past years of emotions, stomped down into his gut and resurfacing tenfold. 

Mingi seems to go still beside him as well, eyes still closed and head still tilted back. And then he says, "I still like you so much."

It comes out a little choked, a barely audible whisper, but Yunho hears it. His breath catches then and all the thoughts, the emotions swirling in his gut and his brain disperse. He finally looks at the red haired boy clearly. He watches as his eyelashes flutter against his cheeks when he finally opens his eyes and tilts his head back down to look at him. He watches his adam's apple bob as he swallows down whatever emotions are running through his head. He watches as Mingi leans forward, resting his elbows on his knees. 

He's so close now—just a few inches separating them. Yunho can make out all the little things on his face; acne scars and tiny star-like moles. He can feel the sizzling of the air—the tension and the relief—mixing in the half foot of space between them. 

"I like you so much and I don't know what to do anymore," Mingi whispers again. He must be nervous because his voice still trembles. Yunho can relate, shoulders tensed and hands shaking as he takes in Mingi’s almost glassy eyes. 

It feels like a lifetime before he can make himself move. But when he does, it’s with intention. Yunho pushes himself forward, steadying himself just before he finds his destination. “Say something if you don’t want this.”

The press of his lips to Mingi’s is electric. His own slightly chapped lips are met with the gentle velvet of chapstick on smooth, plump lips. It’s light and gentle, but it’s like speaking a thousand words. Mingi’s hands come to cup Yunho’s jaws, tongue swiping over his bottom lip, causing a sharp intake of breath. 

Yunho pushes himself up to his knees and finds himself straddling Mingi’s slim hips on the couch. It’s a little awkward, having never been with anyone his size, but he makes it work, tangling his fingers into red locks—having wanted to do so for so long. 

And the kiss crests, bringing the two of them up quickly and then letting go gently. Mingi pulls away after a while, only to leave a series of gentle kisses against Yunho’s lips moving from the corners to just the top lip and then the bottom. He kisses his cheek and then thumbs open his bottom lip to lick against his teeth before resting his forehead against the other’s. 

They’re panting into each other’s mouths, catching their breaths. Yunho lets his fingers trace down the nape of Mingi’s neck to his collarbones and then rests them against his chest. He can feel Mingi’s heart thundering against his chest and is relieved to find his own heart drumming the same staccato beat against his sternum. 

When Yunho finally feels himself coming down, he smiles. When Mingi catches on, he smiles too, a little dazedly and crooked, but still there. 

Yunho brings his hand to tilt Mingi’s face up and leaves one last flighting kiss against his lips. “I’ve been wanting to do that for so long.” 

Yunho goes to sit properly, afterwards, ears burning but smile never leaving his lips. Mingi doesn’t let go of his hand, keeping it in his lap and playing with his fingers. 

“So you like me,” the red haired boy asks. Yunho almost rolls his eyes. 

“Well, yea.” 

“Since when?” Mingi counters. He sits a little straighter and turns to face him. “What about all that anger and hate you were holding against me? How can you like me after hating me for so many years?” 

Yunho tries to figure out the best way to answer. “Well I liked you before I hated you. It’s just that nothing’s changed. Subtract the hate, and there’s only the like left.” 

Mingi looks at him with furrowed brows.

“I’ve liked you for so long,” Yunho finishes, tugging on the red haired boy’s fingers. Mingi screws his face up and then his jaw drops. 

“You liked me when I was twelve? With my acne and my weird teeth?” 

“More like fourteen.” 

“Still.”

“You were my first gay crush.” 

And Mingi laughs. He bowls over and throws himself into Yunho’s lap. Shoulders and entire frame shaking from laughter, he ruffles Yunho’s hair once and then pushes up to leave a giggle filled kiss on his lips. 

“So were you.” 

And everything feels right. Yunho swoops down to kiss him again, and the kiss is more laughter and breathing and teeth than it is kissing, but it feels so right. And so they kiss, and kiss, and kiss and kiss until their lips are swollen and sore and until they’re eyes are heavy-lidded from sleep. 

And then Yunho’s phone rings. Mingi grabs it from where it lies forgotten on the floor and then bolts up in surprise. He turns to Yunho, worry written all over his face. 

“It’s Jongho.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i'm not sure what this chapter is, but it's kind of filler and kind of cute all in one lol  
i hope you guys liked it and there's gonna be more plot for jongho, hongjoong and seonghwa soon!  
please leave kudos and comments as they help motivate me to write!
> 
> and of course, come yell at me on twitter, [jonghhho](http://www.twitter.com/jonghhho)!


	6. chapter 6

They find him sitting on a bench in the park a few blocks from Yunho’s apartment. He’s got his head downturned and his arms tucked into his sides and for all intents and purposes, he looks small and sad. Yunho and Mingi exchange looks before they approach him cautiously. 

“Hey guys,” Jongho greets them first, finally looking up at them with slouched shoulders and a dullness to his eyes.

They take seats on either side of him, wincing a little at the coldness of the metal bench. Silence stretches for a bit longer. 

"How are you doing?" Yunho asks. He isn't sure what the proper question to ask in this situation is. He isn't even really sure what the situation is.

Jongho lets out a breath, fogging up the air a little. He seems to be contemplating his answer, blinking a few times and tilting his head. He finally comes up with a shrug and then furrows his brows. 

“I went to their apartment,” Jongho then starts. Yunho and Mingi exchange a look over his head.

“When he answered the door, I could tell that he’d been crying and there was sniffling coming from inside. And when I asked if he was okay, he just sniffled a little and nodded his head,” Jongho stops, almost letting out a wince. “And I just wanted to hug him so bad and tell him that it would all get better—tell him anything. But it was like my brain had just stopped working.”

Yunho unconsciously brings his hand up to start caressing Jongho’s back, trying to soothe the younger. 

“And he turned around to go back inside and all I could ask was if we’d be okay. It’s the most selfish thing I could have done probably, but he just smiled at me. He smiled and ruffled my hair and said ‘yes’ so confidently.” Jongho stops again. It’s like his breath gets caught in his throat and Yunho can see the tension in his shoulders and the way his firsts are clenched on top of his knees. 

Finally Mingi breaks the heavy silence. “Maybe you should trust him.” 

Yunho looks up at the other, eyes meeting the red-haired boy’s own and holding them as he continues. “Maybe Hongjoong knows what he’s doing and he’s not just pretending like everything will be okay. Maybe he really and truly believes that you and him, and Seonghwa too, will be alright.” 

Yunho blinks as Mingi finishes. “Maybe you should trust him a little more.” 

And something about the way Mingi doesn’t look away from him as he says the last words, something about the determination behind his eyes and the absolute steadiness of his voice makes Yunho shiver. They hold eye contact for a while longer, watching and searching in each other’s eyes until Jongho makes a grumbling noise. 

Yunho ends up sleeping on the floor of the living room with Jongho by his side. The younger is out almost immediately, the stress of the day weighing him down heavily. Yunho however lays awake, staring at the ceiling. His mind races with all the vents of the night and he’s not sure if the fluttering in his stomach is positive or negative. When sleep finally finds him, it’s restless and if Mingi’s also lying awake in his bed in the next room, he doesn’t say a word. 

The sizzling of the pan is what brings Yunho out of his slumber. His eyes fly open and he sits up too way too quickly and pays for it with a moment of dizziness. The smell of coffee and oil lingers in the air and he quickly looks to the open kitchen and sees the youngest busying himself with frying eggs and flipping what looks to be toast. 

“Good morning, Yunho,” Jongho calls, an uneasy smile passing over his lips as he deposits a plate of eggs on the breakfast counter. It’s not a moment later that Mingi comes stalking out of the bathroom, the tips of his hair wet and a towel wrapped around his neck. 

“You’re up,” Mingi says, stopping for a breath just beside the couch and watching as Yunho scrambles up from his spot on the floor. 

“I-yea,” he answers ungracefully. He catches Jongho rolling his eyes behind Mingi, flipping some more toast and finally setting the place on the counter as well. 

"I've got work in a few hours and Jongho offered to make breakfast. Kid was just way before it even got bright outside." Mingi explains, walking back into his room. Yunho wonders if Jongho got any sleep at all. He folds up the blankets that he'd been using throughout the night and gingerly lays them on the couch before heading to the bathroom to swipe water over his face and do the best he could with toothpaste and his fingers. He also swipes some of Mingi's mouthwash, just in case.

When he walks back out, Jongho is staring at the plate of eggs, pout visible on his lips and a mug of coffee sitting in between his hands. Yunho settles into one of the barstools and snaps his fingers. "Earth to Jongho."

The younger snaps back into reality and then smiles a little sheepishly. "Coffee?"

Yunho nods and accepts a mug of hot, dark liquid. It burns on his tongue but soothes down the tiredness he feels grasping onto his edges. Jongho does the same as a silence settles throughout the apartment. Mingi goes about in his room, putting on clothes and styling his hair and Yunho picks at his toast, memories of the night before flooding his mind. 

He almost lets out a yelp of surprise when a phone _actually_ rings. The tone is catchy and annoying but its cut off short as Jongho takes a deep breath and answers it. 

There isn't much back and forth conversation. Yunho watches as a handful of emotions pass over the youngster's face and then his mouth sets in a hard line. It almost feels like he's eavesdropping on something important. Not a moment later, the younger hangs up. He looks distressed but also a little relieved.

"I gotta go," he mumbles and shuffles around a little, grabbing his jacket and the keys he left on the coffee table that's nestled in the corner. Mingi pokes his head out of his room, glasses perched on his nose and looking absolutely adorable with big, confused eyes.

"You leaving?" He asks. Jongho just nods and shoves his feet into his shoes before pushing out of the door. It takes a moment for Yunho to realize who must've called. 

He stands, limbs feeling a bit rickety and rusted. The air between himself and Mingi isn't something he's completely ready to face again. He grabs at his own stuff, awkwardly throwing on his coat and pulling on his socks. Mingi watches him, lips pursed. "I'm gonna head out too, since you have work and all."

A heavy kind of silence settles over the two of them, Yunho standing halfway in his shoes at the entrance and Mingi half inside and half outside of his room. It's not awkward and it's not quite tense, but something has changed between them. Yunho can't quite put a finger on it. Instead he pushes his feet into his shoes again and waves a rickety wave before heading out. 

The air outside is even colder than it had been the night before, crispy ice forming in the dew of the grass outside and crunching a little under his feet. The bus arrives just as Yunho reaches the stop and he thanks whatever god for not letting him have to wait outside. 

When he gets back to his apartment, it's quiet. Wooyoung's shoes are still in the foyer and his bag is strewn over the couch. He doesn't announce his return like he normally would to scare the two and tease Wooyoung once he emerged from San's room about all of the bruises on his neck. Instead he just ends up in bed somehow, pulling his covers tight around himself and drifting off in and out if sleep. 

He can't seem to get Mingi's lips out of his head. He can almost feel the pressure of them against his own and the breathless that puffed against his cheeks at each parting. Yunho tosses and turns in his bed, eventually opting to go take a shower and then play a few rounds of Mario Kart with Sana and Wooyoung who seem to be content in wearing just their underwear around the house (he doesn't mind much). 

He's seriously about to lose his mind. He doesn't even realize how hungry he is until San asks him if he wants to get dinner with himself and Wooyoung. He tags along gratefully and sits through the two's constant bickering and giggling and smooching without even batting an eyelash. When San brings up Hongjoong Yunho just shrugs and then feels a little bad. He probably should have been checking up on his friends. He pulls out his phone and sends a quick '_you ok?_' to seonghwa, hongjoong, and jongho before resuming his meal. Only Hongjoong responds about an hour later with a thumbs up emoji. 

Back at the apartment, Yunho joins his two friends on binge watching anime. He should probably get off his ass and do some homework or get in the practice room but his mind is still racing. When the clock hits 10 o'clock, he decidedly heads back to his room with his phone gripped in his hand tightly.

He mulls over the context of his message for a good 15 minutes, typing and erasing various words of the same meaning. He groans into his pillow as he writes out '_you up?_' and then immediately erases it. He's not asking for a booty call for god's sake. 

In the end he settles for a simple 'hey',. He doesn't even know if Mingi's off from work yet, just hopes he doesn't come off in any certain type of way. He's definitely overthinking it all, but he can't help himself. 

He waits for a reply for ten minutes, drumming his fingers and bouncing his leg. Eventually he joins Wooyoung and San back out in the living room, not even registering that the two have resorted to making out on the loveseat. He's strumming with energy. Nervous, excitement, maybe even fear coursing through him. When his phone buzzes, he scares San half to death if the way he screams and throws himself off of the couch is any indication. 

_hey :)_

He scrambles back into his room, shutting his door a bit too loudly. His fingers hover over the keyboard for a moment too long. 

_wanna meet up?  
think we need to talk_

Fear ripples through him but he manages to text back 'ok'. He scurries to put on a jacket and in a moment of confusion, brushes his teeth. Wooyoung and San barely get a word out before Yunho is out the door, running down the steps instead of taking the elevator in hopes to calm his nerves a little. He hits every single crosswalk with a 'stop' signal and almost screams in frustration at the fifth crosswalk. Taking a left, he all but runs the rest of the way, passing close to no one on the street, which is strange for a weekend night. 

He's two steps into the park grounds when he spots Mingi perched on one of the swings in the playground. Back turned to him and slowly swaying and toeing at some loose pebbles on the cushioned concrete, he looks smaller than Yunho knows he is. He approaches slowly as to not spook the other and when he's just a few steps away, he let's the smile that he's been holding back spread. 

"Fancy seeing you out on a night like this."

Mingi turns, a little startled but mostly with mirth dancing in his eyes. He looks tired, probably from working long hours, but he's smiling warm and content. Yunho sinks into the swing next to his and hums at the cold.

They sit in silence for a while, taking in each other's presence. Yunho isn't quite as nervous as he'd expected himself to be, although he can't help but wonder what they would talk about. He wonders in Mingi is going to tell him that he wants to be just friends. He wonders if he's read everything completely wrong, yet he doesn't think that's the case at all.

"You okay?" Mingi asks, breaking Yunho out of his trance. He looks to the red haired boy and finds himself at a loss for words. 

Mingi's hair is resting fluffing on his head, framing his sharp features nicely. His glasses are perched slightly low and his eyes are twinkling in the light of the lamppost. Yunho has never seen anything like him before. 

"I like you, so much." 

He doesn't even register that the words have left his thoughts until Mingi breaks out into an impossibly wide smile. His guns are on display and his eyes are crinkled but Yunho thinks he's beautiful. 

When Mingi pulls him in, chilled hands against his jaw, Yunho is already breathless. He tastes like coffee and Yunho feels a little silly for having brushed his teeth but it works. Their noses bump and it's uncoordinated, but he wants the kiss to last as long as possible. He nips at the other's bottom lip and giggles when Mingi stutters and immediately pushes his tongue into his mouth and licks up the roof. 

And it seems like they do kiss forever. When they finally pull away, they're both panting, taking in large lungfuls of cold air that burns more than helps, but Yunho isn't complaining. Mingi looks a little out of it, glasses a little skewed on his face and lips bruised a pretty red. It makes Yunho want to dive back in.

"Before we do anything else, I just wanted to say that I like you a lot too," Mingi says, placing a hand on Yunho's chest and smiling. His eyes still twinkle and Yunho feels almost mesmerized. 

"But I just want to make sure that we take things slow. I know I've hurt you a lot and that we'll be able to make things better. Just, slowly, okay?" 

It's not the words he's expecting, but Yunho knows that it's the right words. He knows that it's what he needed to hear. He hasn't thought about much of this, hasn't thought about anything more than kissing the other again. And so he does, drawing Mingi close again and pressing as close as he dare. 

"How can you be so perfect?" He asks in between kisses and melts when Mingi laughs into his mouth. 

He doesn't get to see Mingi after that night. Having neglected all of his assignments, Yunho camps out at first at the library and then at the studios for two days. He only sees San and Wooyoung on occasion when he makes it back to his apartment and the blurry faces of the people in his classes. He texts Mingi almost nonstop however,hands always straying to his phone to send a meme or complain about how sore he is. Mingi is receptive when he's not busy working two jobs and running to his classes. 

He's relieved when Thursday rolls around and he can get away from coursework a little in favor of dancing his heart out. It's not until he actually sees him that he realizes he'll get to see Mingi for the first time in almost a week. He looks the same as usual, joggers and sneakers and a white shirt tucked in the front yet something about him seems different. When Mingi spots him though, he's greeted with a blinding smile.

"Hey."

"Hi."

They don't talk much in between running sets with Seonghwa who distinctly looks like he's just risen from the grave. The dark circles under his eyes are harsh and his hair is unnaturally mussed atop his head. Yunho's only ever seen the older like this before finals, although he could probably guess what the reasons for his unlike-himself appearance. 

Yunho's beat once practice is over, downing a whole bottle of Gatorade before sprawling out on the floor for at least ten minutes. Everyone else seems to be in the same condition, Wooyoung clinging to Seonghwa who just lets him with a lazy smile on his lips and eyes closed. He's hopefully gonna get some decent sleep at night, because he sure does look like he needs it. 

Mingi approaches almost shyly as everyone finally starts packing up to leave. Yunho finds strength inside himself as the other approaches to haul himself off the floor. 

"Hey," he greets. He definitely doesn't mentally smack himself for being impossibly eloquent. 

Mingi doesn't seem to notice his internal battle however. "You busy tomorrow night?" 

The question catches Yunho off guard. Are they? Are you going on dates now? He's still not one hundred percent sure what level of relationship they're striving for. But he doesn't let his mind digress too far. "No?"

He sounds unsure, at which Mingi just chuckles. He throws a towel over his shoulder and starts to retreat. What?

"I'll pick you up at seven."

_What?_

Yunho doesn't even manage a response as he watches Mingi grab his bag and exit the practice room. A second later, there's an arm being wrapped around his shoulder and a low whistle in his ear. "I see things went well between the two of you."

Wooyoung is still staring after Mingi when Yunho turns to him. He shrugs off the shorter one's arm a little aggressively and collects his things. 

"All thanks to you and San occupying our shared living accommodations, I suppose," he replies. Wooyoung doesn't even seem to be distressed by Yunho's supposedly scathing remark. He just shrugs and goes for his own bag. 

Yunho definitely doesn't panic when he gets home from the studio the next day. He doesn't stand in the hot shower for at least 30 minutes trying to imagine what kind of date they'd be going on. He doesn't stare at the entirety of his wardrobe and decides that he has absolutely no clothes to wear. He definitely does not run into San's room with just boxers on, and scare the living lights out of an almost asleep Wooyoung. 

"I HAVE NOTHING TO WEAR."

Wooyoung catches himself just in time from falling off the bed. When he looks up at Yunho with squinted, bleary eyes he looks annoyed. 

"Just wear whatever. He's definitely seen you at your best and your worst already, no need to act like it's the first time you're _meeting_ the guy." 

Wooyoung proceeds to roll over in (not) his bed and tuck himself back into the covers. He snuggled up to the shiba plush that San claims is his favorite. 

"You're absolutely no help," Yunho calls and then stops just outside the door on his way back to his own room. "Where's San?"

Wooyoung grumbles. "Group project."

It takes Yunho another thirty minutes of trying on various outfits before he settles for a pair of dark jeans, a black shirt, and a black and white flannel. He looks plain and simple but in what he hopes is a boyfriend-y way. He really hopes they're not going to a fancy dinner or anything like that.

Once he's set some spray in his hair and put on an awful lot of deodorant, Yunho paces the length of the living room, glancing at the weird purple clock on the wall that San has picked up at the university's large scale dorm-garage sale. The hands seem to move slower than usual, taunting Yunho with every single breath he takes. When the hand of the clock meets seven o'clock on the dot, the front door flies open with a smiley San dragging in a flustered looking Mingi. 

"I found a stray!" San yells, causing Wooyoung to groan from inside the former's room. "Just kidding, but I did find a Mingi pacing in front of our door, saying '_hi_' to himself a million times!"

Mingi is looking up at Yunho sheepishly. If Yunho thinks he's pulled off the boyfriend look, he's absolutely wrong because Mingi has on simple distressed light wash jeans and a giant tan sweater tucked into the front of them. His hair is swooped and parted just off center and his glasses (as much as Yunho loves them) are nowhere to be seen. He looks comfy, to say the least and perhaps even a tad bit adorable. With an uneasy smile on his face, he finally lets out a mumbled '_hi_' as San pets his hair and then goes to his room, yelling out Wooyoung's name. 

"Hey," Yunho supplies and he can't help but feel like greeting each other is all they've been able to do ever since last week. 

"You ready to go?" Yunho is the one who asks, walking past Mingi who is all but staring straight at him. He tugs on his shoes and stands to his full height once more where Mingi is smiling at him dopily. 

"Have you eaten?"

They pick up a quick bite from a few street vendors on their way to whatever the destination might be. Mingi seems to want to surprise him. Yunho hums around his hot dog and laughs when Mingi manages to get sugar all over his chin. It's comfortable, the way they feel like friends, but the underlying butterflies in his stomach suggests otherwise. 

Mingi leads them into a building and up two floors of stairs. Yunho tries to get a sense of the place they're going to but ends up clueless anyway until they round the corner and emerge in front of large glass windows looking into the lobby of their destination. 

"Surprise?" Mingi chuckles, pushing the sensor to open the doors. Yunho gapes a little and can't help but bounce a little on his feet, excitement spreading through him quickly. 

"Boss gave me some discount coupons. Otherwise, I would not have the money for this," the red-haired boy explains. 

They're given a thorough explanation of the whole set-up and given face masks for the goggles. Yunho has only ever done VR once when they were offering a free experience at their university last semester. When he looks up after putting on his own mask, a laugh bubbles up in his throat. Mingi looks absolutely adorable in the red cat shaped mask that almost is the same shade as his hair. 

"You look cute too," the other comments, rolling his eyes and pulling Yunho along to the first corner of the cafe. 

It's one fit of laughter after the next as they move from one experience to the next. Yunho bellows out in laughter when Mingi screeches in horror at the roller coaster one and then proceeds to make a fool of himself by falling off of the ledge trying to grab a piece of cake. VR skateboarding turns out to be just as intense as the real thing and Mingi falls all three times he tries it. They respectively both fail miserably the first time they try Beat Saber and then keep trying to beat each other out afterwards, rotating through seven songs until the worker at that station starts giving them the side eye. 

By the end of the night Yunho's cheeks hurt and there's a stitch in his side that won't go away, but he's happy. Mingi seems to have enjoyed himself too, smiling back at him with his gums on display. When they get back down to the street, there's more people than before, no doubt out to enjoy the nightlife. It's also colder than before and the breeze traveling up through Yunho's flannel making him shiver. 

It's a few blocks later that Mingi takes his hand,sending warmth and electricity up into his arm and then a few more blocks before he realizes they're almost at the other's apartment. He lets Mingi pull him up the stairs and through the door. He's not quite ready to go home anyway.

They order chicken and Mingi pulls out cans of beer from his fridge. Yunho loads up Spider-Man onto the TV and Mingi narrows his eyes at him. "Should've guessed. You're such a spider-man type" 

They argue back and forth, ignoring the chicken grease on their fingers (despite their gloves) and the movie playing in the background. Yunho almost throws himself to the floor when Mingi tries to tell him that he doesn't understand the meaning of Hawkeye's entire presence within the MCU. It goes on until they've finished the chicken. Mingi has just finished his first beer and Yunho is halfway through his second. The movie is still rolling low on the TV and a slight buzzing is coursing through his limbs. 

Somewhere between their arguments and eating, they'd moved impossibly closer,knees pressed against each other's and fingers intertwined. Yunho doesn't understand how quickly they're progressing. He doesn't understand how he can already adore the other so much, but in that moment he finds he doesn't care all that much either. 

Neither of them knows who moves first, but soon their lips are pressed together, around chicken grease and the taste of beer Yunho can taste something that's distinctly Mingi. It's soft and sweet and there's far too much giggling as Yunho recognizes which part of the movie is playing but Mingi presses on. He eagerly moves to press Yunho back into the couch, cushions pressing down and practically laying down. 

Eventually Yunho tunes out the sounds of the movie in favor of sucking on Mingi's bottom lip and dragging out a whimper from him. There's teeth and some elbows in between but Yunho manages to get the other panting, and far too quickly, he feels the tell-tale signs of arousal kicking in. He lets out an involuntary moan when Mingi does something incredible with his tongue and feels himself rolling his hips up unconsciously.

As if sensing this change Mingi moves away, sitting back on his heels and looking down at Yunho. He must look debauched, if the smirk on Mingi's swollen lips is anything to go by. "We can't."

Yunho pushes up to his elbows, biting his lips in embarrassment. Mingi's eyes widen and he throws his arms out in protest. "It's not that I don't want to!"

And its Yunho's turn to smile as words seem to flow out of the other's mouth. "I would love to, you have no idea. I just want us to take things slow, okay? Just make sure we get the hang of this before we rush into anything crazy."

"The hang of this?" Yunho asks, raising an eyebrow. He points at the space between himself and the red-haired boy. "_This?_"

Mingi seems to go pink at that and he sputters. "This? Us. Us? Right? You and me?" 

Yunho presses his lips together, stifling the laughter bubbling in his chest. He doesn’t answer, just pushes up all the way to reconnect their lips. 

“Us,” he breathes in between kisses, exploring every corner of Mingi’s mouth, bringing them to the edge and then backing off. 

It lasts a little (a lot) longer than they mean for it to, Yunho pushing into Mingi’s space and then almost toppling off the couch out of eagerness. When he leaves, Mingi cages him in by the door one last time, placing quick kisses on the corners of his mouth. 

Getting in bed that night, Yunho can’t seem to wipe the smile off his face. He wonders if Wooyoung and San feel something like this, which is why they’re always in each other’s spaces all the time. He’s thinking about the way Mingi had giggled about his theories on the different timelines within the MCU when his phone lights up the darkness of his room. 

_i work tomorrow morning  
but do you wanna hang out around 4?_

He feels somewhat like a teenage girl, screaming into his pillow at the thought of seeing Mingi again. San yells through the walls, something unintelligible, but Yunho shuts up. He thrashes around a little longer before responding. 

When his heart stops beating so quickly and his fingers stop twitching in excitement, he falls asleep thinking about the red-haired boy.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i haven't updated in like.....2 months???? and no one told me?  
just kidding. i'm really, so sorry yall (if anyone's still reading, that is).  
it's coming to an end so hopefully i can crank the last few chapters out.  
but, isn't yungi so cute? and a little rushed (smh)
> 
> anyway, tell me what you think!  
you can find me on twitter [@jonghhho](http://www.twitter.com/jonghhho)!


	7. chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hello, there's some FILTH at the end of this chapter  
do be advised and feel free to skip it :)

It’s been two weeks and all seems to be going well. Yunho and Mingi meet up more than they need to, in all honesty. Yunho is at the cafe during Mingi’s shifts and Mingi comes and sits in on one of Yunho’s dance classes (with his instructor’s approval, of course). They study together and get lunch together when they can.

And of course, they make out. A lot. Yunho usually leaves Mingi’s apartment with bruised lips and a low thrumming in his veins from heated makeout sessions. Sometimes his legs wobble as he walks down the steps and he has to stop to take a breather and then remembers how pretty Mingi had looked, lips red and swollen, and has to think about things that aren’t Mingi. All in all, they seem to be almost inseparable.

On one Saturday, Yunho shows up to Mingi’s apartment unannounced with his arms full of homemade meals, courtesy of his mom who’d stopped by the night before for a quick check-in. Mingi shovels rice and bulgogi into his mouth and hums around his food with a blissful expression on his face. Afterwards, Yunho kisses the taste of the food out of the other's mouth which should probably be a little disgusting, but he can't really be bothered when Mingi squirms in his lap and he's left a little breathless. He finds he has to excuse himself for a _certain_ reason and comes back with flushed cheeks and a knowing glint in Mingi's eyes. 

In the past week, things seem to have gone back to normal between Jongho, Hongjoong and Seonghwa. The youngest is much happier than Yunho remembers seeing him and when he slides into the seat next to Hongjoong on one of their cafe exploits, everyone seems a little shocked to witness the youngest plant a firm kiss on Hongjoong's cheek nonchalantly. They all silently agree to not pry and let the two explain to them when they're ready but Yunho can't help but snicker behind his hand when he catches sight of Jongho's hand intertwined with the older's. 

They don't pry at dance practice either because Seonghwa seems to be back to his own self too. It's a little surprising to find Hongjoong lazing around in the corner of the practice room when Yunho and Mingi walk in together. During break, Yunho and Wooyoung exchange furtive glances with each other as Seonghwa seems to be glued to the other's side, Hongjoong's head bent toward the older's and whispers being exchanged. When practice ends, the two leave together like always and half of Yunho wants to follow them back to their apartment. (Mingi distracts him though, by using the bottom of his shirt to wipe away his sweat and exposing a strip of skin that Yunho hasn't been able to get out of his mind for the rest of the night.)

The end of the semester is approaching quickly and their first dance competition is looming in the near shadows as well. Yunho finds himself buried in his two textbooks, groaning because of his abysmal math skills and comprehension of the English language. Mingi books them a study room in the library on a particularly dreary Wednesday and Yunho shows up to find an assortment of pastries and two large hot chocolates (with three shots of espresso added to each). 

Mingi helps him study for his statistics class and Yunho helps by being undisruptive for once. He manages to finally understand the lesson they learned two weeks ago and Mingi smiles at him proudly before tussling up his hair and laughing at the scrunched up expression on his face. Between actually studying and taking breaks to munch on pastries, they spend a good four hours in the study room, shooing away first years who don't seem to understand how to book the rooms and ignoring texts from their friends about dance practice tomorrow. 

Yunho manages to write up his analysis of the Edgar Allen Poe poem that they've been focus studying all semester, and Mingi seems to have made a lot of progress on his proposal for his marketing class. When they finally pull away from their textbooks and laptops for another break, Yunho's brain seems to be on the verge of exploding. He isn't prepared for his non-major classes, but he knows he's gotta get through them somehow. As if sensing his distress, Mingi runs a hand through Yunho's hair again assuring him with steady eyes and a calm smile. "You're doing amazing."

The butterflies in Yunho's stomach never seem to go away, no matter how much time he spends with Mingi. He smiles back at the red-haired boy and takes Mingi's hand in his own, placing a kiss on his knuckles and chuckling to himself a little. "You are too."

"Maybe we should get out of here, go back to my place?" Mingi suggests, raising his eyebrows and pushing up his glasses. Yunho groans, looking from the boy before him to his laptop opened to a page of his statistics homework. 

"I need to finish this. It's due tomorrow," he deadpans, pointing to his homework. Mingi pouts, letting go of his hand and leaning forward with his arms braced on his chair and invading Yunho's space. 

"I'll help you finish it in the morning."

"You don't get up until noon on Thursdays."

"You can wake me up."

"And risk death by your flailing limbs? Think again," Yunho retorts. Somewhere between their banter Mingi gets in a peck on his lips. It's sweet and brief and totally disarming and Yunho whines as he pushes the other away. 

"Not fair. I demand a retrial," he barks. Mingi is shaking with quiet laughter, a smile stretched wide over his teeth and gums showing a little. Yunho hasn't gotten used to the way his heart skips a beat at that beautiful smile. 

"You'll be the death of me," he says again, shoving at Mingi's shoulder and looking over at the dimmed screen of his laptop once more. He knows he shouldn't give in. "Besides, I told San I'd be home tonight."

Mingi stops abruptly at that, frowning. "You told San you were gonna be home tonight of all nights? When neither of us have class until 2:00 PM the next day?"

The insinuation of the two of them sleeping in, and doing other things together has Yunho blushing. He can feel the tips of his ears going red. Spending the night at Mingi's is one of the newest developments of their relationship. Yunho has been living out of the overnight bag he's thrown in the corner of Mingi's room and has been wearing the other's clothes since the weekend. San had raised his eyebrow at him when he came home for the first time yesterday morning but he'd announced he was just grabbing some fresh underwear and then was right back out the door. 

They mostly just cuddle while they leave One Piece playing in the background and talk about what each other missed while growing up. Mingi talks about growing up without his dad and Yunho feels a little bad when he counters about his annoying relationships to which Mingi laughs about. ("Are you really telling me about your past relationships while we're cuddling in bed?" "Listen, I have no secrets and no qualms about calling out all my shitty girlfriends and boyfriends.") 

Sometimes they kiss lazily until their lips are sore or they're too tired to move and sometimes Yunho has to physically detach himself from the other, pressing fingers to his own lips and calming his racing heartbeat as Mingi lays there and stares up at the ceiling with a blissed out expression on his face. Sometimes Mingi will chase after him, lips attaching to whatever skin Yunho has exposed and it'll start a war of Yunho trying to dislodge the red-haired boy and Mingi's kissing turning to biting. 

"Well, it's just been a while since I've been home," he argues, voice going a little timid at the narrow-eyed look Mingi is giving him. 

"I'm not gonna stop you if you want to go home, just know that I'm hurt that you would even think of doing such a thing." Mingi turns away from him then, eyes focusing on his laptop once again and fingers typing away at the Google Doc he has opened. 

"It's not because I don't wanna spend time with you, you know that!" Yunho wails, throwing his arms around the red-haired boy and pouting. He's almost sure that Mingi's doing this to get a rise out of him, and it sure is working. He tries to get Mingi to look at him again but fails and after several attempts, he just huffs and sits back in his seat again.

"I just really can't fail this class. And I don't know what the appropriate amount of time to spend at your apartment is because I've never really, truly done this before and sometimes I think I might ruin it just by being too eager or too clueless. And, I really like what we have going for us right now."

Words spew out of his mouth like a faucet. One second he's pouting and the next he's holding his breath after saying so many unplanned words. But like a charm, it breaks Mingi out of his silence and he turns to him once more. There's a sort of glint in his eyes and a small crookedness to one corner of his lips as if he's trying hard not to laugh. 

"You have so many thoughts and absolutely no filter," Mingi states, his smile growing. "And it's impossibly adorable." 

Yunho feels Mingi take his face into his large hands, tenderly cradling it as he leans in to peck him on the lips once. "Stay with me tonight."

Without having to say anything else, Yunho knows he has no control and that he's lost. Mingi leans in and connects their lips again, hands moving down to his chest and then around his waist as they move as close to each other as they can in their sitting positions. Yunho finds himself giggling a little as gentle touches of Mingi's hands tickle at his sides and then bites at the other's lower lip in retaliation. 

They stay like that for a while, kissing slowly and gently, soaking in each other's presence as if they've been starved of it. When they finally pull away from each other, Yunho feels the butterflies return to his stomach. Mingi looks soft, hair a little tousled and eyes shining with something he can't quite put a name to, and he feels the fluttering move violently from his stomach to his chest. 

"Let's finish up this statistics homework, shall we? Then we can go home and cuddle."

Seonghwa looks positively like death. Bags under his eyes and sweat trickling from the tips of his hair. His hands seem to be shaking as he grips his water bottle hard and takes a swig. 

"You okay? San asks as the rest of the crew disperses for their own bottles of water. Seonghwa brushes him off, slumping down onto the ground. They go extra hard at practice now since their first competition is coming up that weekend. Yunho watches everyone in the mirrors as they start to fog over, calls out each person who moves a little weirdly or misses the hard hitting parts of the beats. 

"Fine," Seonghwa answers, panting a little as he all but collapses onto the floor. 

"You don't look fine," Wooyoung joins in, wrapping his arms around his boyfriend's middle and pouting. Yunho agrees that Seonghwa most definitely doesn't look fine. 

Practice drags on for another hour. Yunho is beat when they finish their final run through. His shirt is sticking to his frame in all the wrong places and his throat feels like sand as he drags in huffs of air, trying to catch his breath. He lays completely still on the floor of the practice room, breathing and breathing. He feels someone lay down just beside him but doesn't open his eyes to see who it is. The stink of sweat permeates the air and a thin layer of moisture covers the corners of the practice room mirrors. 

The door opens, finally letting in a breath of cool air from the hallway and a voice calls into the room. "Ew! Someone warn me next time this place smells like a boy's locker room!"

Hongjoong's voice is recognizable anywhere. It's slightly high toned and at this moment, extremely whiny. Yunho finally opens his eyes, takes in the form of the shorter man standing in the doorway and then his eyes flit Mingi laying just next to him.

No one says anything as Hongjoong props open the door and meanders through the sprawled out bodies. He slides onto the floor on the spot just by Seonghwa's head and looks down at him with a disapproving look in his eyes. "You look like the undead." 

Seonghwa groans and makes a show of trying to swat at the other. Hongjoong just laughs and removes a small hand fan from his bag and angles it at Seonghwa's face. Yunho glances around the room at the people picking up to leave and then around at his friends who are nonchalantly trying to watch the older two. Even Mingi looks intrigued by the dynamic playing out before them. 

And although everyone seems a little too interested, no one asks. San pulls himself up and drags Wooyoung with him, calling out goodbyes and warning Yunho about coming home. Afterwards, Yunho hauls himself and Mingi up from the floor, urging the red-haired boy to grab his stuff. He knows it's nothing, but can't help but feel like he's snooping around his friends. Hongjoong and Seonghwa seem...happy, and really, he can't be upset about not knowing everything going on between the two of them.

Mingi asks about Hongjoong on the way home, not really knowing too much about the older yet and Yunho tells him as much as can. When they settle into bed, his limbs feel heavy and his mind is cloudy already but Mingi's words ring loud and clear through the dark room. 

"They're alright, aren't they?" 

Yunho contemplates his answer. He thinks about Jongho and the smile the younger always wears around Hongjoong and then thinks about the way Seonghwa looks at Hongjoong. He's thinking about their dynamics and the way the three of them feel around each the rest of them. And eventually, Yunho falls asleep without answering Mingi's question, just cradling one of Mingi's arms to his chest. 

Everyone in Yunho's classes seems to know about the competition coming up on Saturday because he gets a number of claps on his back as well as words of encouragement and a couple of phone numbers from some unsuspecting girls. Even his statistics professor writes him a note on one of his exams, wishing him good luck next to what looks like a thumbs up and the 91 he received on that exam. 

Mingi makes an odd face at the three phone numbers that Yunho passes to him during lunch that and then bursts into a fit of laughter. "Good luck. I'm rooting for number two," he says, casually pointing to the number in the middle. 

"Haha, very funny," he replies, balling up the pieces of paper and tossing them aside. He definitely wouldn't be needing them. 

The morning of the competition has Yunho's nerves running on high. He's mostly excited and a bit more nervous than he usually is. His parents call, announcing that they won't be able to make it, needing to urgently go out of town to take care of his grandmother. He understands and asks them to say hi to his grandmother for him. His mom sounds sad but he assures her that it's alright and that he'll have competitions in the future. 

When he gets off the phone, Mingi is watching him from the other side of the kitchen. He blinks at him and then reaches a hand out to him, smile spreading as Yunho laces their fingers together. 

"My mom's coming," he says, voice gentle. Yunho pulls him in further, not moving from his seat at the breakfast bar. He buries his face in Mingi's stomach and breathes in the scent of Mingi's laundry detergent. He's gotten used to the clean, kind of sweet scent. 

"I remember her face," he talks into Mingi's shirt who wriggles in his arms but doesn't pull away. "She was really nice to me all the time."

Mingi chuckles and runs his hands through Yunho's hair. Soothing, calming, and entirely pleasing, he would probably purr if he were a cat. They stay like that for a while, soaking in each other, feeling their warmth and Yunho's ears picking up Mingi's steady heartbeat. He feels his nerves coming down and the jitters that were present in the bouncing of his leg die out as well. "Do you think she'll remember me?"

Mingi pulls away then and grins down at him. Taking his face in his hands, he leans down and kisses firmly on the mouth before moving away. "I'm sure."

Seonghwa looks good. Chains and a bulletproof vest pulled over his plain white shirt. Black cargo pants and hair styled up, he looks sharp and unforgiving. Yunho wonders if he looks like that too or if he still looks round and soft like he always seems to. 

Mingi on the other hand looks like he belongs in these clothes. All of their outfits are variations of one another, but with a white button-up over his shirt tucked and styled just slightly different. His holsters and straps hang off him differently too and Yunho can feel himself staring. He looks almost deadly, eyes hidden underneath the shadow of a cap. Wooyoung had dusted tiny bits of makeup over all of them, concealing Seonghwa's dark circles, rimming Yunho's eyes with a bit of kohl, and dabbing red on Mingi's lips. Yunho wants so badly, but he restrains himself.

Instead, he wrings his hands together and bites at his already chapped lips but tries to smile as the next team is introduced. They're next and there are at least three hundred people in the crowd. The stage is larger than the one they danced on last year, the performance hall bigger, and the competition is tougher with more crews than before as well. 

"Nervous?" Mingi asks, running a hand over Yunho's chest. He wonders if he can feel the way his heart is trying to beat out of his chest. 

"A little."

And for some reason, he can't seem to watch the crew on the stage now. There's blood rushing through his ears and an unexplainable pressure in his chest and he can't make himself look towards the stage. It's not as if it's his fest performance, and it's definitely not because he hasn't performed in front of big crowds before, but something about today is just different. 

"You're really nervous, huh?" 

Mingi seems to be able to read him through the stiffness of his posture and the way he bites his lips. "Are you always this nervous?"

Wooyoung jumps in front of him and barrows his eyes. His own eyes are lined with kohl and smudged around the edges. His eyes look like they're smouldering, red framing the inner corners of his eyes. "I've never seen you so nervous before."

Yunho can't recall ever being so nervous to perform before either. "Y-yea."

Mingi smoothes a hand on his back and smiles, big a goofy. "You're our best dancer, no need to be nervous."

Seonghwa slides up beside him then, offering a reassuring but crooked smile as well. "Yea, your nerves are getting to me now. If you're nervous, the rest of us should be straight hyperventilating."

This earns a bark of laughter from everyone and Yunho finds it's calming his nerves. San jumps in to agree with a pout first and then a dimpled smile and then comments about how he probably shouldn't have dyed a fraction of his hair stark white on the night before the competition. Everyone had been confused when he'd walked into their dress rehearsal a few hours ago, Wooyoung shaking his head and commenting about how he's now dating a skunk.

A roar of applause rings out from the audience and they're all brought back to the present. Lights dimmed and bodies pressed together on the small platform by the stage, awaiting their turn which is coming up in mere seconds. 

They huddle up as the previous team makes their way off the stage. Adrenaline pumping and palms already sweating, Seonghwa looks each and every one of them in the eyes. "Let's do it."

He's never been one to say too many sentimental things. He doesn't beat around the bushes and doesn't speak poetically like Hongjoong sometimes does, but it doesn't matter. They've worked extremely hard for this moment. They're given blood, sweat, and a heck of a lot of tears to stand on the stage. Everyone understands those three words. They feel it in their chests as they break away.

The stage is dark, minimal light stretching over the dark floor. A lime green piece of tape marks the center and Yunho watches as Seonghwa takes his place at the center. Yunho crouches low and closes his eyes and takes a deep breath. There's a familiar pat on his shoulder that he knows is from Wooyoung and then he feels warm fingers squeeze his hand. When he opens his eyes, he's almost face to face with Mingi who nods at him. 

When the first notes filter through the speakers and Seonghwa jumps up to a roaring crowd, he feels the familiar thrum of the performance take over him. The lights that illuminate the stage, switching from blue to red and then to green are a little blinding and sweltering, but he doesn't notice. The crowd beyond them is black, but he can make out the swaying and can hear the cheering. And when he takes the center to lead the team in a sequence of silly dances, he hears the booming sound of applause and affirmations. 

The performance all comes to an end much quicker than Yunho realizes. They're pushing through one last set, one last pulse of energy practically radiating from each of them. They end with a kick, standing their ground and panting as the crowd bursts into cheers, blinding white light shining for a moment longer and then going black. 

They stumble off stage, smiles lining each of their faces. Wooyoung is yelling and the competition staff are trying to shush them as they're quickly shuffled into the waiting area. Yunho passes dancers from other groups who congratulate them and shoot them a thumbs up. 

When they're back in their corner of the waiting room is when Yunho finally gets to catch his breath. Wooyoung and San are clinging to each other, yelling about how that might have been their best performance and "did you hear them screaming?!" 

There's so much commotion and Yunho's heart is still trying to beat out of his chest when Mingi comes to view. He's got sweat dripping down the side of his face and is still breathless, but he's smiling with all of his teeth. His gums are on display and his eyes are crinkled and Yunho feels himself grinning back at him. And as if some dam is broken, he lets out a whale-like sound. Mingi bursts into laughter as well as the rest of the team and Wooyoung's cackling pierces through the room.

"Park Seonghwa!" A voice yells.

When they all turn, Hongjoong is running towards them, Jongho in tow behind him and both of them with large smiles on their faces. The smaller jumps into the oldest's arms and yells out, "You guys were amazing!"

More people stream into the room, family and friends of the rest of their team but Hongjoong doesn't seem to mind. He clings to Seonghwa and babbling on and one and Yunho watches in fascination. Everyone else seems to be enraptured too, as it's the first time they're seeing the three of them together since _that day_. Even Yeosang seems to be watching the exchange with interest. 

Mingi wraps an arm around Yunho's middle as Hongjoong moves away a millimeter and then Wooyoung shrieks as the smaller pushes up to plant a quick kiss to Seonghwa's lips. Yunho gapes at the two of them, eye drifting from Seonghwa to Jongho and then back to Hongjoong. Mingi seems to clutch at his shirt. Hongjoong rolls his eyes as San stutters out, "Y-you guys are…?"

There's a beat of silence before Hongjoong turns to Jongho who's been standing off to the side a little. He gets pulled into the circle, not protesting when Hongjoong grins at him and then shoots the rest of them a wicked look before planting a kiss to the younger's lips as well. Wooyoung shrieks even louder as Yeosang hums in an appreciative way. "Figured," he mumbles before turning away. Yunho watches the exchange with wide eyes. 

"Wait, you guys are all…?" Mingi speaks up finally, pointing at the three before them. No one answers but Seonghwa smirks and wriggles his eyebrows before he ushers the other two out of the room and waves a hand at everyone. "Come along, team. Awards are about to start soon."

Yunho follows in a sort of trance, feeling Mingi let go of his shirt. He looks to the red-haired boy who is still gaping at the three boys in front of them. "Close your mouth," Yunho whispers as they exit to the audience, taking seats in the performer's section. Mingi complies, smiling sheepishly at being caught. 

"Mingi!" A voice calls in a slight whisper. Yunho looks back and immediately recognizes the slight eyes of Mingi's mother. 

Mingi stands, rushing over to her and on instinct, the rest of the team stands as well, bowing to her respectfully. Mingi introduces the team as _'the team'_ to which his mom chuckles. 

"I just wanted to thank you guys for welcoming him so warmly. Transferring hasn't been easy for him and he works a lot so I was worried about him not having time to make friends," she starts, looking around at the lot of them. Yunho watches as her eyes linger over him for a beat longer than the rest. "I'm glad he found such caring friends."

Mingi looks comfortable in her presence, pulling her close into a hug and smiling down at her. She's shorter than Yunho remembers, but he's grown a lot in the time that they were apart. When the rest of the crew settles back in their seats, Yunho tentatively makes his way to the mother-son duo. When Mingi catches his eye, he smiles and pulls Yunho to his side. 

"Mom, I don't know if you'll remember him, but this is Yunho," Mingi explains, excitement evident in his voice. "We were friends before we moved, remember?"

Recognition flickers in her face before she smiles, soft and sweet. It's the same smile he remembers seeing after school when he would show up unannounced to Mingi's house and she would bring in bowls of chips or homemade sweet rice drinks to them. "Of course I remember," she replies. 

The hug is unexpected, but Yunho accepts it, feeling himself melt into the warm embrace. "You guys were best friends, how could I ever forget?" 

Mingi looks from Yunho to his mother, the smile lingering on his face. "He's helped me a lot in...a lot of ways, mom. I couldn't believe it when I saw him again after all these years."

Mingi's mom goes on a tangent about how much he's grown and how handsome he's gotten. Yunho feels his ears go red at the compliments. She asks about his major and his parents and Yunho answers all of her questions and waits for Mingi to jump in. But he doesn't. He stands there, watching their exchange and Yunho doesn't miss the way he twiddles his fingers. 

"You'll have to take care of this one for me," she says, breaking Yunho out of his own thoughts. She points an accusatory finger at Mingi with a sour look on her face. "He doesn't know how to take care of himself."

Yunho laughs at this, quickly glancing over at Mingi before replying. "I know what you mean. He never has any food in the house and I have to basically drag him out of bed every morning."

It feels like he's said something wrong. Mingi seems to stop functioning for a second and his mom cocks her head to the side a little, glancing between the two of them. Yunho looks from Mingi to his mom and then opens and closes his mouth. He's definitely said something wrong. 

"I'm over a lot because Mingi's really good at math and it's not really my strongest subject. I end up staying over sometimes when it gets really late," Yunho quickly says, diverting the attention back to himself. "Mingi's got a pretty comfy couch, if I do say so myself."

The mood doesn't settle but it seems conflict has been avoided as she laughs at his remarks. Mingi still looks a little frozen but be chuckles a little stiffly too. He avoids Yunho's eyes. 

They win second place, first place going to a team that's known for winning all of their competitions throughout the dance community. They celebrate by going out for dinner and a round of drinks where Hongjoong clings to Seonghwa and Jongho after just one beer and Yeosang starts making weirdly flirty eyes at the three of them. Wooyoung and San disappear only after the first round of drinks, shooting their groupchat a series of kissy face emojis. 

The night comes to an end rather early, for all of the excitement and adrenaline that must still be coursing through their veins. But Yunho suspects there's other things on everyone's minds, especially Mingi who sits by quietly the entire night. After having said goodbyes to his mom, he'd been distant. Smiling where prompted and carrying on enough conversation to not alert anyone, but Yunho knows better. 

They're back in Mingi's apartment, showered and changed. Yunho waits as Mingi slowly gets ready for bed, brushing his teeth and removing his contacts. He looks at himself in the mirror a beat too long and Yunho sighs. They'd exchanged a minimal amount of words since dinner and he's starting to get annoyed. 

When Mingi finally settles beside him on the couch, he's still zoned out. Master chef plays almost muted in the background and Yunho can't seem to take his eyes off of the red-haired boy. "You okay?"

Mingi looks over at him, biting his bottom lip. Hair still damp and glasses a little crooked, he looks lost. "Yea," he answers.

It irks him, the way Mingi turns away from him again and stares at the TV. He's not watching it, just staring at it as he gnaws on his bottom lip. Yunho shifts a little to sit facing the other. "Talk to me."

"About what?"

Yunho narrows his eyes. "About earlier. About tonight. Anything, Mingi. You're distracted and I can tell. Just tell me what's bothering you."

There's silence between them for a while, TV still humming low in the background. Yunho searches the other for something, but he doesn't know what he's looking for. 

"Then can I ask a question?" He probes, leaning in slightly. Mingi nods. 

"Why did you freeze? When I talked about being over here all the time to your mom, why did you freeze? Is it because she doesn't know about us?" 

"That was like three questions," Mingi replies and then closes his eyes. He takes a deep breath as Yunho waits. 

Mingi shifts so he's facing him too. He doesn't look at him, however, just looking down at the couch where he fiddles with a loose thread. 

"She doesn't know…" he trails off. Yunho frowns. 

"It's okay if she doesn't know. We've only been doing this for, what, almost a month?" 

Mingi shakes his head at that, closing his eyes again. A pained expression crosses his face before he looks up at Yunho through his damp fringe. He looks small, something Yunho hasn't seen much of. 

"She doesn't know that I'm gay."

_Oh._

"Oh."

He doesn't know what to say or what to do. It's been such a long time since Yunho came out to his own parents. It had been relatively painless, his mom hugging him tight and his dad looking a little uncomfortable but nodding and then patting his shoulder. He'd ways been confident in himself, even in the moments leading up to sitting down with his parents, he knew it would be alright. But as he looks at the red-haired boy sitting crossed legged on the couch, shoulders curved in and looking so small, he suddenly becomes aware of how scared he must have been at one point in his life. He realizes Mingi's scared. 

"Come here," he whispers and moves slowly to the other. Wrapping his arms around Mingi's shoulders, Yunho pulls him close. Running a hand through his hair and then soothing it down his back, Yunho takes a deep and shaky breath. 

"It's alright," he says.

He stays like that, running his hands over Mingi as the other sinks into him, shivering s little but then calming down. He seems to melt around Yunho, slinking his arms around his middle and pressing his face into Yunho's chest. He doesn't cry, which Yunho is a little grateful for, but he doesn't say anything more.

And they awkwardly cling to each other until their limbs and butts go numb and until Netflix asks them if they're still watching. When Mingi does pull away, he's got an indent of a crease from Yunho's shirt stretching across one cheek. His hair is almost dry and his glasses were thrown off somewhere long ago. He looks alright though, looking up at Yunho with round eyes. 

"I'm sorry," he says, rubbing his eyes with the backs of his hands. Yunho finds it adorable.

"You don't have to be sorry. I almost outed you to your mom without consent, I'm the one that should be sorry."

"It's okay," Mingi says, a small smile blooming on his face. He's beautiful. "Maybe it's time I tell her though so we can avoid the awkward slip-ups."

Yunho can't seem to help the smile that spreads on his own lips. He dives forward, cupping Mingi's face in his hands and kissing him like he's been starved. Mingi reciprocates enthusiastically, giggling into the kiss and then sucking on Yunho's tongue like a pro. Too soon, Yunho is hovering over Mingi, laid out on the couch and looking entirely debauched with his lips red and swollen and his shirt riding up above his belly button. 

His abdomen is toned and golden and Yunho traces circles into the warm skin of the other's hips as he leans in to capture his lips again. Mingi moans into his mouth, gripping Yunho's shoulders and arching up into him and grinding their hips together. Yunho groans and presses the other down onto the couch, knocking his head to Mingi's collarbone and panting. They're both hard in their sweats and Yunho's hand is clenched in Mingi's shirt. 

"Fuck," he pants when Mingi rolls his hips up again, whimpering slightly at the friction. When Yunho looks up, his pupils are blown wide, arousal swirling in the pit of his stomach. Mingi's hands are tugging at his shirt, pulling until it's coming up over his head and off onto the floor. Yunho's taken aback by Mingi's sudden actions and he moves to sit at one end of the couch as the other climbs into his lap, rolling his hips down and latching his lips to Yunho's neck. 

He's shivering, but not from the cold. He can't help the moans that build up in his chest as Mingi sucks a bruise into the junction of his neck and shoulder and then bites the same spot. Hips canting up on their own accord, Yunho chases the other's lips, tongue laving over the seam of Mingi's lips before pushing in hungrily. 

"Shit," Mingi says, moving away to get rid of his own shirt and Yunho stares a little too intensely at the way his waist tapers from his shoulders and chest. 

"You're so _pretty_," he mumbles against the warmth of Mingi's skin, nibbling at his collarbones and then running a thumb over a dark nipple. 

Mingi breathes in sharply and then rolls his hips more fervently as Yunho licks over the other dark bud. His tongue soothes after scratching his teeth over the sensitive skin. "Yunho, please. _Please_." 

Yunho feels himself hesitate. They haven't done anything yet, wanting to take things slow and wanting to savor every moment together; not that they haven't _wanted_ to before. He looks up at Mingi's eyes, clouded with arousal but eyes big and sincere. "Are you sure?" 

A beat passes and then Mingi shifts his hips down so that his ass drags over Yunho's erection. "Fuck me, Yunho."

He moves quicker than he ever has in his life, hooking his hands under Mingi's legs and shifting them off of the couch. Mingi groans when Yunho lifts him, legs coming to circle around his middle as he carries the other to the bedroom.

He all but tosses Mingi on the bed, grabbing the lube and a condom from the underwear drawer where he knows Mingi keeps it. He discards his sweats before climbing over Mingi on the bed, tugging at the red-haired boy's obstructive clothing as well. "Fuck, Mingi," he groans when he realizes the other isn't wearing underwear. 

He lays his palms against the toned, corded muscles of the boy's thighs, squeezing and feeling the muscles. He travels up, hands finding the boy's hips again and eyes settling on the boy's clean shaven skin. Yunho swallows a lump in his throat. Mingi is gifted, his dick longer than most with a pretty curve to it and when Yunho wraps his hand around the shaft, Mingi wails, hips kicking up in frustration. "Shit Yunho, I'm gonna come so fast." 

Yunho bites back laughter as he slowly moves his hand, thumbing at the head and spreading the precum that's collected there. "This okay?" 

Mingi whines. "No it's not okay! It's too fucking slow, shit-" He stops as Yunho dips down to tongue roughly at the tip. Mingi throws his head back as Yunho tries to sink down as far as he can, almost getting all the way to the base in one go. Mingi's voice sounds wet above him, hands coming to tangle in his hair and pulling unconsciously. Yunho moans around the dick in his mouth. 

"Fuck."

He doesn't have to put much effort into making Mingi come. He bobs his head, swirling his tongue, hollowing his cheeks and swallows around the head a few times before the other boy is clawing at the sheets and fucking up into his throat. He tries to say something, tries to warn Yunho that he's coming, but it falls on deaf ears as Yunho pushes Mingi's hips down to the bed and pulls off just until the head is resting on his tongue. Warm, sticky wetness fills his mouth, a little salty and a little gross, but he swallows anyway. 

Mingi looks fucked out against the sheets, hair an absolute mess and limbs loose. When Yunho crawls up to face level, he smiles panting into the kiss he delivers to his mouth. "Are you gonna fuck me now?" 

Yunho feels the arousal surging downwards and feels himself twitching in his underwear. Mingi smiles lazily as he reaches between them to pull at the waistband of Yunho's boxers just enough to free his aching hard on. The head of his dick is red and he feels like he's about to burst from just the touch of Mingi's hands on his chest. 

There's the sound of foil tearing and Yunho watches in a trance as Mingi rolls the condom down onto him, inhaling sharply when he wraps his hand around his shaft, tugging a few times before moving away. Yunho whines at the loss of contact but the mischievous glint in Mingi's eyes holds him back from touching himself.

"I want you to watch while I open myself up," Mingi says moving to turn around on his hands and knees. He stops halfway, leaning back to press a kiss onto the corner of his mouth. "No touching." 

Yunho whines at those words, leaning back on his knees to watch as Mingi turns around. He flinches at the sound of the lube bottle snapping open. It's filthy, the way Mingi squeezes a dollop of the lube directly onto his rim, puckered and so inviting.

He teases himself, pressing lightly before spreading the lube some and then dipping just to the first knuckle and then pulling back out. Yunho watches, mouth open and his dick aching, as Mingi pushes one finger all the way in and stays there for one, two, three beats. "Yunho," he says. He's panting. 

Yunho crawls over to him, hands immediately going to the other's hips and soothing over his back. "What is it? What's wrong?" 

Mingi shakes, rolling onto his back hand glistening with lube. He shakes his head side to side, closing his eyes. Yunho can see that he's already hard again. "I can't do it." 

His heart seizes at those words, cupping Mingi's face in his hands and kissing him gently. "It's okay, baby. We don't have to. You don't have to do anything you don't want to."

But Mingi whines, pushing Yunho away and frowning. "No, I can't do it. I want you to do it." A beath. "I want _you_ to stretch me."

Yunho's breath hitches and Mingi pushes the lube unto his hands and then presses kisses onto his forehead. "_Please_." 

He doesn't need to be told twice. Snapping the cap of the lube open, he pours a generous amount onto his fingers before diving forward to attach his lips to Mingi's again. The press in of his finger is excruciating, Mingi whining into his mouth and his dick throbbing almost painfully at the feeling of his finger being encased by slick and warmth. The kiss turns mainly into panting into each other's mouths as Yunho works his finger slowly. The second is even slower, tears streaking down the sides Mingi'a face and disappearing into his hair as he clenches hard at the intrusion. 

"I'm sorry, baby. Does it hurt? I can take it out. We can stop," Yunho says, panic rising in his chest, but Mingi shakes his head. He quickly pulls Yunho back down against him, rolling his hips down and effectively fucking himself down on Yunho's fingers. 

"No, it's good. It's so good. Keep going."

Groaning, Yunho fucks his fingers a little quicker into Mingi, scissoring and pushing until Mingi screams, clawing at his shoulders as he rubs against his prostate. The red-haired boy thrashes, moaning out a string of curses and scrunching up his features. Yunho is breathless, looking down at the way Mingi seems to be losing his mind.

"Shit, I'm gonna come," Mingi pants, grabbing at Yunho's wrist to still his movements. Yunho looks up, surprised and finds himself blown away at the fucked out expression on the other's face. "Don't make me come yet." 

Yunho can't do anything but nod, resuming thrusting his fingers when Mingi lets go of his wrist. He throws his arms over his head, moaning as Yunho squeezes more lube into his hole before slowly fitting a third finger into him. The boy below him screams, throwing his head back. Mingi all but claws at Yunho, pushing him back and straddling him. 

"I'm gonna come too soon, you have to fuck me now," he says, reaching behind him to guide Yunho to his entrance. But Yunho is quick to stop the other with a firm hand on his elbow. 

"Wait, are you sure? I barely got a third finger in you." Concern is laced in his voice, thumb rubbing circles into the soft skin of Mingi's thigh. The other chuckles breathily and leans in. His tongue drags over the column of Yunho's neck, up until teeth bite at the lobe of his ears.

"Fuck me."

It's Yunho's turn to wail, feeling Mingi's hand cupping his length and then the length of him breaching the ring of muscle against the boy's entrance and his dick slowly being engulfed in a heat that he's never felt before. He draws out a loud curse that turns into a moan as he becomes fully sheathed. Mingi pants into his ear, shivering a little on Yunho's lap and letting out little curses. "Shit you're huge." 

Yunho has always gotten that comment. Every guy he's been with has looked at him with envy and every girl had looked at him with a little fear. But Mingi looks up at him with swollen, red lips and a fire behind his blown out eyes. "I better be sore in the morning," Mingi says and rolls his hips forward. 

A moan is punched out of Yunho's chest at the feeling. Heat and friction and tension all meeting at just the right point, he can feel the way his dick pulses at the newfound sensation. Mingi must sense the way he tenses as he rolls his hips because Yunho finds himself being pushed back, laying against the sheets and Mingi settles his hands on either side of his shoulders and looks down at him. This time Mingi's the one reassuring him, leaving a kiss against his sternum and rolling his hips skillfully. 

"I'm so close," the boy atop him says, shifting so that all of his weight is focused on taking Yunho's dick. He feels weightless, thighs tensing and a fiery warmth growing in the pit of his stomach. 

Mingi starts dropping his hips a little faster, whining and losing any kind of rhythm. His hand comes up to pinch at his own nipples, moaning out a curse as his hand travels lower. It feels instinctual, the way Yunho grabs at both of Mingi's wrists so that he doesn't have a chance to touch himself.

"Wha-" Mingi cries but is cut off as Yunho pushes the other off of him. He crowds Mingi, kissing him and pushing him back until he's the one on his back again, legs framing his hips and his dick leaking onto his stomach. 

"No touching."

A whine in punched out of Mingi at those words, the same words he'd used against Yunho earlier. He hovers for a little, running his tongue over Mingi's chest and swirling it around the pert buds of his nipples before he lines himself up with the other's entrance again. 

"Scream for me."

And Mingi does scream. He screams at the stretch and at the seemingly unending length that presses into him. He screams at the way Yunho angles his hips up, large hands cupping his ass and holding him there as he leans back a little on his hunches. At the first roll of his hips, Mingi sees stars, dick twitching at the sensation of Yunho's length dragging against his prostate. At the second roll of his hips, Mingi babbles curses, Yunho's name and unintelligible sounds tumbling from his lips. It only takes three more skilled strokes for Mingi to come all over himself, ribbons of white streaking over his stomach and his chest, and some even reaching his chin at this angle. 

Yunho curses, low and gravely. He stills his hips and soothes a hand down the other's thigh, and then pushes the now damp hair away from his face. When Mingi opens his eyes, he looks absolutely debauched but then a smirk spreads out over his face and he pulls Yunho in for a long kiss, tongue running over the roof of his mouth and over his teeth as they pull apart. 

"Keep going," he says, rolling his hips down again. Oversensitivity rocks through him, sending a shiver down his spine and lip catching between his teeth. 

"What?" Yunho says. He goes to pull out, only feel Mingi's ankles locking and his heels knocking on his lower back. 

"I said, keep going," Mingi says again, rolling his hips once again. A moan slips from his lips. "Keep going. _Make me cry_."

Yunho throws his head back, arousal kicking in again and swirling in his stomach at those words. He thrusts slowly, building a steady pace, breathing through his nose. The build up to his orgasm is quick, only a few hard thrusts making his knees quake and his hands press firmly into Mingi's hips. He switches angles, lifting one of Mingi's legs and thrusting upwards and the change is immediate. 

Mingi cries out, feeling the way Yunho's length drags against his prostate and pressing against his oversensitive bundle of nerves. Tears collect at the corners of his eyes, threatening to spill over at each thrust of Yunho's hips. 

Yunho presses Mingi's leg back a little further and presses in slowly now. He wants to feel everything, the warmth of Mingi's engulfing him and the way Mingi scrabbles to lace their fingers together. He almost lets out a sob when his eyes travel down to where they're connected. Lube glistens on the other's smooth skin, skin a little pink and raw. He looks absolutely astonishing, but the image of his dick pushing in and out of Mingi's perfect asshole is what does him in.

A loud moan rips through Yunho's chest as he comes, spilling into the condom at the sight of the two of them connected. Mingi also moans, loud and clear as tears spill over the rims of his eyes. 

The comedown in unreal, Yunho thrusting shallowly until he's completely spent and then slowly, ever slowly pulling out of the other. Tears still stream down Mingi's face as Yunho stumbles away for something to wipe them down with. When he returns, Mingi is laying spread eagle on the bed, his soft dick proudly displayed and sniffling a little. Yunho smiles, cleaning the two of them up gingerly before he fishes out two pairs of clean boxers for them both. 

They've never cuddled without clothes on before, but it works. It's warm and cozy under the covers and the skin on skin contact creates electricity on Yunho's skin. Mingi hums, satiated and smiling into Yunho's chest. "That was...the best dicking I've ever received." 

Yunho lets out a guffaw, pushing the other boy away and then pulling him back into his embrace. "It better have been."

"But seriously, your dick is huge. How do you contain it in your pants?" 

Yunho smacks Mingi's shoulder, the sound louder on bare skin. "Shut up."

Mingi hums again, snuggling as close to Yunho as humanly possible. "I'm sorry about earlier." He mumbles. 

Yunho blinks. "About your mom? I thought we talked about that already."

Mingi looks up at him, red hair sticking to his face in odd places. "I just wanted you to know that it's not because of you or us, or that I'm ashamed or anything like that. I just-there just wasn't a good time to tell her." 

Yunho doesn't need to know. He doesn't have the right to be upset or annoyed, and he's not. He just wants Mingi to know that. 

"You don't need to keep talking about it if you don't want to." Yunho kisses Mingi slowly, softly as if they haven't exchanged enough kisses. "Just know that I'm gonna be here for you no matter what. I'm not mad or sad. Just glad that you felt comfortable enough to share that with me."

Mingi bites his lip. He looks like a child, eyes big and round, and maybe a little glassy looking up at Yunho as if he'd put the stars in the sky. 

"Okay," the red-haired boy answers. Yunho nods, chin knocking on Mingi's head a little who chuckles in response. And then he's looking up at him again.

"Also, I just want you to know that what we just did, was not an emotional rash decision to fuck. It was a romantic, boyfriend-like decision to fuck. Got it?" 

Yunho narrows his eyes and then pouts. They've never used the term until now. They didn't want to establish anything too quickly and they didn't want to label their relationship so quickly either. And Mingi seems to pick up on it, eyes widening and mouth parting to say something. But Yunho smiles, leans in to peck the boy's cheek before settling back into the pillow.

"Got it." He says, a smug smile stretching over his lips. "Goodnight, boyfriend."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AHHHHHH  
sso i've never done THAT before (sweats)  
i've literally never written smut before uhm...  
ha..ha...welp i guess there's a first time for everything.  
next chapter is gonna be the last chapter AAAAAA  
thanks for being on this journey with me :)
> 
> you can find me on twitter [@jonghhho](http://www.twitter.com/jonghhho)!


	8. chapter 8

The weeks leading up to the end of the semester and winter break are exhausting. Yunho spends as much time as he can in the practice rooms and Mingi is bowed over textbooks throughout the night. They see each other briefly, sometimes dropping in to share a quick lunch or a coffee break. Yunho goes back to sleeping in his own bed for the sake of giving his boyfriend more time and space to sleep when needed. 

Of course they also find time for other, more necessary things, especially when Yunho drops into Mingi's apartment with snacks. Sometimes it's a good hour of napping together and sometimes it's cuddling on the couch and watching anime. But more often than not it's quick fucks in the kitchen or against Mingi's desk, gasping into each other's mouths and taking the frustration of finals out with pleasure. 

In the final week, they both seem to get somewhat of a reprieve. Yunho's dance finals are underway which means he doesn't technically have classes anymore. Mingi is finishing up presentations, and spends most of his time cooped up in his room, bent over his laptop or practicing his presentations to an empty room. 

There's a comfortable quiet stretching out in the air around them as Yunho lazily lounges on the bed with Mingi's large frame thrown haphazardly over his own. They're getting in an early afternoon nap after Yunho's second to last dance final that morning and Mingi's final actual class of the semester. Neither of them seem to actually be drifting off though. 

"What are you thinking?" Yunho asks, hand running soothingly through the other's fading red locks. Mingi hums, contemplative and somewhat sleepy. 

"Just about the break...about how much I'm gonna miss having you around," he mumbles sleepily against Yunho's collarbone. He feels a warmth blossoming in his chest at Mingi's words. 

"I'm gonna miss you too."

Mingi looks up at him through his messed up bangs and crooked glasses and Yunho places a kiss to his forehead, something he's become used to doing. The other cups at his jaw though as Yunho goes to retreat and leans up to connect their lips. He releases a slightly surprised 'umph' but surrenders to the softness of Mingi's lips and the way he seems to be kissing him with a bit of anticipation. 

Yunho goes to move away after a while but Mingi shakes his head, throwing his leg over Yunho completely and straddling him. Yunho isn't exactly surprised, but he pulls back all the same, pushing against Mingi's shoulders as a sign to slow down. 

"Woah there, princess. What's the big rush?"

Mingi's ears go scarlet at the nickname, something Yunho had come up with a week or two ago after discovering how much Mingi liked to roll around in bed. He'd called him a pillow princess as a joke but the way Mingi had flushed and then pulled Yunho down over him before kissing him feverishly had told a completely different story. 

Mingi seems to tense up a little, still sitting in Yunho's lap but mind seemingly racing behind his unreadable expression. Yunho finds himself rubbing soothing little circles into his boyfriend’s hip bones, lips pouting slightly as he waits for Mingi to collect his thoughts. 

"I wanted to ask you something…" the other finally says, moving off of Yunho to get into a more comfortable position. "You don't really have to if you don't want to, and i don't want to make you uncomfortable or anything so it really is okay if you don't want to."

Yunho can feel Mingi rambling, hands gripping at the hem of his shirt and twisting in nervousness. He lays a hand on Mingi's knee and it seems to do the trick. The other goes silent as he looks up at Yunho again, eyes a little wide and lips parted. "It's okay, Mingi. Whatever it is."

It seems to do the trick because Mingi is letting go of his shirt and sitting up a little straighter. "I was wondering if you'd maybe like to spend a few days at my house? Like, at the beginning of the break? Maybe?" 

His voice tapers off into a whisper, eyes diverting away from Yunho’s and ducking his head. Yunho is a little taken aback, relieved that it’s not something bad and entirely flattered that Mingi even brings up something as big as this. He shifts a little, moving to look at Mingi a little closer. “Are you sure? Like, actually sure about this?” 

Mingi looks up at him a little hesitantly, but there’s a smile playing on the edges of his lips. “Yea? I mean, I’ve been thinking about it for a while...you know, for old time’s sake.” 

It’s almost like his chest is filled with something...nice—flowers and rainbows and clouds maybe, but probably something a little more like affection and adoration. He all but attacks Mingi, throwing himself over his boyfriend and kissing him fiercely, laughing in between breaths and Mingi pawing at him. 

“Yes,” he finally says after they’ve rolled around the bed for a considerable amount of time making out. The other seems a little thrown but recovers quickly and nods. 

“I’ll tell my mom I’m coming home a little later,” he supplies, already reaching for his phone in excitement. Mingi chuckles a little nervously. 

“You sure she won’t mind?” 

Yunho looks up, leans over and plants a kiss on the other’s forehead. “No way. She loves you and she hasn’t even met you yet since you moved away.” 

Mingi giggles, a loopy smile returning to his face. “Besides, I tell her everything anyway. She’ll be glad to not have to cook for me for another few days.” 

Things settle down between Yunho and Mingi and they’re preparing for the first five days of their winter break together now, but everyone else seems to have a lot more going on. 

It’s two days before the official last day of exams and Yunho and Mingi are more relaxed than ever. Yunho’s dance finals are over and Mingi has already finished up all but one of his final presentations and exams. 

They’re in the middle of lounging in Yunho’s apartment, discussing what they should do when they go to Mingi’s in the next few days when the front door bursts open. San spirals in, stomping and fuming from every angle. The scowl on his face is unreadable but definitely angry. 

Yunho sits up, worry passing over his features and Mingi follows suit, having never seen his boyfriend’s roommate so worked up before. San is usually always smiling and incredibly calm and it rocks Mingi a little to see him so disoriented. 

He paces around the entryway, running his hands through his hair and huffing deep breaths, almost wheezing. He seems to be muttering under his breath but Yunho can’t make out any of the words. 

“You okay?” Yunho asks, de-tangling himself from Mingi’s long limbs and getting up to check on his roommate. 

San seems to finally register that there are other occupants in the house. He swivels around to face them, anger dropping for a split second as he takes in the two of them. His eyes first fall on Yunho then skitter over to Mingi and as if on cue, the boy breaks down. 

Yunho rushes over to his roommate, alarmed at the choked sobs coming from his smaller frame. “Woah, woah, what’s wrong? Is everything okay?” 

The other just shakes his head and leans into Yunho as he closes in, wrapping his arms tightly around his roommate’s shaking frame. Mingi quickly reads the room and excuses himself, grabbing all of his stuff and fleeing to Yunho’s room. 

Yunho leads San to the couch gingerly, tucking the other’s hair back and waiting until his sobs die down into hiccups and finally disappear into just small whimpered sniffles. The silence between them isn’t uncomfortable. San and Yunho have shared many vulnerabilities with each other before. 

When his roommate seems to have calmed down, Yunho goes to fetch some water and instructs San to hydrate. His roommate just glances at him and gives a grateful up-turning of his lips. A few moments later, Yunho finally speaks. 

“Can I ask what’s up, or do you not want to talk about it?” 

San sniffles a few more times and stares at his lap, feet tucked up under his knees and a cushion cradled to his chest. Yunho waits because he knows his roommate, he knows San will want to talk. 

“He-uh he said he wasn’t ready yet,” San says, voice wobbling a little and breaking in the middle. He sniffles and tries again. “Wooyoung said he wasn’t ready.” 

Yunho frowns a little. “Wasn’t ready for what?” 

San seems to be bracing himself as he answers in a hushed voice. “He’s not ready for us to live together yet.” 

Yunho frowns even more at the words. He racks his brain for the appropriate response, tilting his head and rolling the information over in his brain. “He’s not ready for you guys to live together yet?” 

It’s more of a statement than a question but San nods, sniffling and wiping at the itchy sensation of dried tears on his cheeks. “But you guys practically live together already.” 

San huffs a sigh and nods. “Yea, I know. That’s why I asked. I’ve been thinking about it all semester, trying to find the right time to ask him about it. And I thought he’d agree, and that he’d be happy to. Especially now that you and Mingi are together and neither of us think you guys are ever going to break up or anything, and you’re probably tired of walking in on us, and we haven’t walked in on you two yet, but it’s bound to happen...and I just thought it would be nice and fun. But I guess he’s still not sure.” 

Yunho hums as his roommate empties himself of all his thoughts. He chews on his lip a little as he tosses the ideas around and listens to San’s rambling words. He knows Wooyoung has always had some issues with commitment but he doesn’t know any of the specifics. But San and Wooyoung have been together exclusively for a while, even before Yunho had met them so it doesn’t seem like such a stretch for San to want to move in. 

But Yunho also knows that San is a passionate being. He throws himself headfirst into everything he does with more passion than anyone he’s ever met. It’s a wonder how he’s managed to keep someone as flighty as Wooyoung around, but Yunho has also never seen two people more suited for each other. 

“It’s just unfair,” San huffs, throwing his hands up and sighing heavily. “I don’t know how many times I have to prove to him that I’m not just around for a little while and gone.” 

“Maybe I’m just really not enough for him.” 

The way San’s voice catches is heartbreaking. Yunho looks over at his roommate and frowns even deeper. He’s got his head buried in the cushion in his lap and his voice resounds with a type of sadness that Yunho isn’t sure he’s ever felt before.

“That’s…” Yunho tries, but he’s not sure what to say. He’s never been one for relationship advice. “That’s ridiculous, San, and you know it.” 

San huffs next to him, clearly frustrated. Yunho soothes a hand down San’s back, rubbing in tender circles that he hopes makes the other feel a little better. He’s really not cut out for this. 

“You’re one of the most selfless people I know, San, and Wooyoung knows that too. You waited for him and assured him that you weren’t going away over and over again, and deep down, I know that he knows that too.” 

San takes a long, deep breath but doesn’t surface so Yunho keeps talking. “Just because he and you don’t want the same things at the same time, doesn’t mean he will never want those things. Wooyoung is a lot more careful and thinks probably way too much, but you know that, don’t you?” 

San nods. Yunho feels some of the tension leaving him. He pats his roommate’s back a little. “You two just need to talk it out is all. Let him come to you and tell you what he wants. You’ll figure something out.” 

It takes a long moment of silence before San unfurls himself from his awkward position, stretching out his neck and back and grumbling a little. He doesn’t seem to be as tense anymore, which Yunho is thankful for. 

With a deep sigh, San finally breaks the silence. “You’re probably right.” His lower lip seems to wobble a little and Yunho’s worried that his roommate is going to devolve into sobs again, but he just sniffles a little and wipes away the ghost of his tears. “I’ll talk to him. Probably pushed him a little too much, anyway.” He chuckles a little. “I’m a dramatic bitch, you know.” 

Yunho is glad to hear his roommate laughing, even if it isn’t his full on belly laugh that he’s used to. He pats San on the shoulder this time, smiling down at him. “You guys are literally meant for each other.” 

San seems to lighten a little more at those words. Then he shrugs a little, lips curling up at the edges as he mumbles, “I know.” 

Having calmed down his roommate and made sure he was okay to be alone, Yunho slips into his room quietly. Mingi is lounging on his bed, headphones in and phone raised to his face. He climbs into the bed next to his boyfriend, snuggling into Mingi’s ribs, probably somewhat uncomfortably, but the other doesn’t complain. 

Mingi removes one earbud and puts his phone down, carding a hand through Yunho’s hair as he lets out a deep breath. “Everything alright?” 

“Mm,” Yunho hums, closing his eyes and breathing in Mingi’s scent. It’s really just the smell of clean laundry, but Yunho likes the off-brand scent of the dryer sheets Mingi uses. “A bit of trouble in paradise, but nothing that can’t be fixed with some hugs and kisses and a bit of conversation.” 

Mingi hums at the answer, not probing, which Yunho is grateful for. “You did good, boyfriend,” he mumbles, hand still tangled in Yunho’s hair and scratching pleasantly. 

“Thank you, boyfriend,” Yunho replies, amusement laced in his voice. He pushes up to place a chaste kiss on Mingi’s jaw, laughter rumbling through his chest.

The last day of exams wraps up with Yunho acing his statistics exam and Mingi giving his all at his last presentation. Yunho bounds out of the math building, making his way to the east side of campus where he knows Mingi will be waiting for him in front of the little duck pond.

He spots his boyfriend from a mile away, still vibrant red hair swept back in a handsome way and his long form fitted with a dashing white button down and black slacks that make his legs look endless. 

Yunho’s a little breathless when he reaches the edge of the pond, walking hastily to reach his boyfriend with a large, goofy smile stretched across his features. Mingi notices him as he nears and Yunho melts at the warmth blossoming in his chest from the way Mingi’s eyes crinkle at the corners and disappear as he grins big and toothily at him. 

He doesn’t even give Mingi a chance to say ‘hi’ before he’s cupping his boyfriend’s face in his hands and pulling him in for a long kiss. Mingi doesn’t protest as his hands come up to wrap around Yunho’s waist, bringing them together for longer than probably necessary. 

They don’t spare a single glance at all the passerby, probably giving them weird and scandalized looks as Yunho and Mingi soak each other in, as if they hadn’t seen each other just that morning. 

“You look so good today,” Yunho mumbles against Mingi’s lips as they finally pull apart. He places one last kiss against Mingi’s already slightly bruised lips. 

“That’s ridiculous. I look good everyday,” Mingi counters, firmly grasping Yunho’s hand as they start trekking toward the bus stop. 

Yunho hums, neither denying nor agreeing with the comment, to which Mingi throws him an offended sort of glare at him that has the both of them breaking out into laughter. The bus ride home is filled with more laughter as they tell each other about their days, the stress of finals and presentations, and classes finally having lifted from their shoulders completely. 

They’re giggling as they stumble into Mingi’s apartment and bustle around, taking turns showering and pampering themselves, readying themselves for their first date in what feels like forever. 

Yunho’s ready first, because he’s over-excited and he taps his foot and wiggles around in his shoes as he waits in the entryway for Mingi to finish with whatever he’s doing. The sun has already set and the rest of the apartment is bathed in darkness—the cold, wintry kind that makes Yunho want to jump back in bed and cuddle Mingi until they’re toasty. 

When Mingi does finally emerge, Yunho is mesmerized. There’s nothing exceptionally different about him, yet there’s something that he can’t really put a finger on. Maybe it’s the slight shine on his lips from gloss or too much lip balm, or the way his hair is pushed back again, but this time a little messily as it falls over his temples.

Yunho bites his lip as he gathers thoughts, words just a hair’s width out of reach. He’s not sure what he should say as Mingi ducks his head and toes on his shoes. 

“You’re pretty,” is what his mind supplies him with in the end and Mingi looks up, amused and somewhat appalled, but mostly endeared. 

“So are you,” he supplies, pressing a light kiss against Yunho’s lips as he leads him out of the door. 

They eat at a rustic, retro-feeling barbeque restaurant that Wooyoung has been begging them all to visit as a group. Yunho can’t stop giggling as Mingi tries to feed him a lettuce wrap, and then almost dropping it as some oil pops on the grill before them. 

Mingi also chuckles as he reaches over the table to pinch Yunho’s cheeks which are turning a rosy pink after he downs a single shot of soju. “Pink looks good on you,” is probably the worst line Mingi has ever cracked, but Yunho seems to enjoy it. 

The night passes as they converse about nothing and everything and slowly winds down as they sip cinnamon punch and share a small serving of shaved ice. Mingi complains about a brain-freeze after scooping too much into his mouth and Yunho soothes it with a sticky peck to his knuckles, to which Mingi complains some more. 

“I wanted to ask you something,” Mingi broaches, finally putting his spoon down and taking a sip of his water. Yunho hums in question, scraping the last of the red bean into his mouth and looking up at his boyfriend.

There’s a hesitation in Mingi’s face that Yunho doesn’t like. He grips Mingi’s fingers over the table, squeezing in reassurance. The other seems to roll words around in his mouth for a second before he finally speaks. 

“I need your help.” Mingi’s voice is low and Yunho leans forward a little to hear it. He cocks his head in question, not saying anything but prompting him to continue.

“My mom,” Mingi starts and then sighs. A slight fear creeps up into the pit of Yunho’s stomach, but he pushes it down. Mingi starts once more.

“My mom doesn’t know about us, you know?” Yunho nods. 

“And I think it might be time.” Mingi hums in between, rearranging the words that are on the tip of his tongue. “I need your help with it. With telling her...about us. About me.” 

Yunho doesn’t expect it, the tears collecting in the corners of his eyes, but he blinks them back. He comes around the table to sit next to Mingi, to pull him into his arms and to just feel the way his frame is shaking, nerves getting the better of him; both of them. 

“I would be honored,” Yunho returns, grinning into Mingi’s shoulder as the other huffs a sigh of relief and chuckles against him. 

When Yunho releases him, Mingi pulls back and there’s a sort of twinkle in his eye; his grin bearing something Yunho can’t quite decipher. He knows he’s beaming too, lacing their fingers together tightly and gently pecking Mingi’s lips, his cheek, his temple. 

“I’m so proud of you.” 

And this time it’s Mingi who’s blinking back tears.

The train ride to the outskirts of town is short. Too short for Yunho to properly prepare himself to be back in front of Mingi’s mother. He’s a little bouncy, jumping at the sounds of the train coming to a stop at the station as Mingi chortles beside him, his hand clasped in Yunho’s tightly. 

“It’s gonna be fine,” Mingi says as they move to the exit. There’s a nervousness to his voice that gets reflected in the way Yunho all but vibrates as he follows the other. 

On the platform, Mingi halts as he surveys his surroundings. Having been gone for half a year, everything looks entirely different to his eyes, although in actuality probably nothing has changed all that drastically. Yunho shifts on his feet too as he looks around, eyes searching for something familiar. 

“There she is,” Mingi finally says, breaking Yunho’s train of thought and movement. He feels Mingi tugging on his hand, a lump forming in his throat as soon as his eyes land on the figure standing off to the side, arms crossed and eyes narrowed. 

“She looks kind of mad,” Yunho says skittishly. “You told her the right times and all, right?” 

Mingi shushes him as they near, a smile replacing the weariness that had once lined his face. “Mom!” He calls out, pulling Yunho forward more insistently. 

The fluttering in Yunho’s stomach intensifies as Ms. Song turns toward them. Her features break out into a smile, eyes crinkling in the same way Mingi’s do. There’s a familiarity behind her smile that has Yunho relaxing a bit.

“Did you boys have a good trip?”

She hugs Mingi immediately, her smaller, shorter frame being engulfed by Mingi’s towering height. Somehow Yunho hadn’t remembered that she was so much smaller than the two of them. He stands a bit to the side, giving the two space as she fusses over Mingi’s light jacket. 

When she finally turns to him, Yunho feels his mouth drying. He stammers out a greeting, eyes flickering to Mingi who watches in slight amusement behind his mom, giving Yunho a thumbs up that doesn’t help at all. 

“You’re just like him,” Ms. Song tuts, narrowing her eyes for half a second before she tugs at the openings of Yunho’s jacket. “You two are gonna catch a cold!” 

There’s warmth behind Ms. Song’s eyes as she pats at Yunho’s shoulders before she smiles up at him. “It’s good to see you again, Yunho.” 

Yunho chuckles abashedly, eyes meeting Mingi’s over his mom’s head. He’s grinning at them, relaxed and unperturbed and Yunho feels all of the icy, wintry cold in his limbs disappear. They share some kind of a secret conversation between them; without words or actions, but just through their eyes. 

“I knew that I would see the two of you together again, someday,” Ms. Song sings, turning toward the exit and beckoning them along. Yunho and Mingi follow, elbows and shoulders bumping each other as they climb the steps. 

He thinks Ms. Song is probably right. He thinks that they were, somehow, in their own twisted way, destined to meet each other again. 

Yunho turns to look at Mingi as they exit the train station. He drinks in the way Mingi smiles, the way his nose scrunches a tiny bit as he hefts his bag up onto his shoulder. He takes in the tinge of red coloring the tips of his ears and the way his hair falls forward as he looks down to check his steps, and Yunho engraves every detail of his boyfriend into his mind. 

He thinks that they’ll be okay like this: together. He hopes that it’ll always be the two of them.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i'm back!   
first of all, i would like to apologize for the LONG wait.   
but, better late than never, amirite?  
but as always, thank you so much for reading, for sticking around, or for coming around.   
thank you for all of your support and love and honestly, i'm to thrilled to say that this thing is finally finished.  
also, sorry for this kind of anticlimactic ending to a sort of anticlimactic story, but ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯ that's just how it happened~  
comments, questions, funny jokes are all welcome, and i hope you'll stick around to see what i have in store next :)  
thanks xo
> 
> find me on [twitter](http://twitter.com/jonghhho) :D


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